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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Lise07 you don't have to keep up appearances here. It's sometimes really good to just let it all out here. The long rave is good for that. You will definitely find support here.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @cutiepiekitty well done you for being so brave and sharing with B something you'd never talked about before. Sounds like you feel safe with her. Your picture sounds lovely. I did go and get some of those pens today - thanks for the tip.

Hi @Appleblossom hope your day has been a good one. It's still 36 with hot winds here. For once I'm glad to live in town and not rurally. So many people suffering and struggling with the fires. And all the critters too.

@Gazza75 hoping your farm is not being affected by local fires. Stay safe.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Yes @eth I feel comfortable with her now and trust her. Was the 5th time seeing her and it took that long to get to that stage.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

My car engine made weird banging (or flapping) noises, driving to work (this morning).

It scared me, like something major was wrong.

Then when I opened the bonnet, the engine was sizzling - like it had over-heated.

I could not find out what was wrong.

The Radiator fluid was fine, the engine oil level was okay I think (I topped it up just in case).

I've booked a mobile mechanic to check my car tomorrow - because it may be serious.

Certainly scared me.

The engine wiring in my old car bonnet virtually melted from short-circuiting (years ago), & almost caught the car on fire (I only just managed to drive home).

That was very scary.

Adge

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi and good morning to anyone around this morning. I havent' gone thru my notifications or read back pages yet since I was here Tuesday night. Saying hi and tagging @Snowie @Julia2019 @Shaz51 @CheerBear @Owlunar @MDT @Adge @Appleblossom @Bunniekins @Maggie and @Angels333 because I can see you've tagged me - will try to respond individually when I get a chance to. Thanks for the tags.

I have a meeting this afternoon with my new coordinator of supports and quite a bit to do this morning to be organised enough to use his time efficiently. Including checking out another 7 applicants for a job I advertised for new support workers. That makes about 20 all together and I need to make a short list of the most potentially suitable ones. Hoping to then interview maybe 5 and then choose 2 to add to my team.

Saw my psychologist yesterday and she reminded me that if I get too busy and don't have enough down time I can go into hypomania, something I very much want to avoid. So I might not be around some days, but will always try to respond where I am tagged even if not immediately.

I can also see that some interesting new threads have been started and will try to join in at some stage, but it may not be until Saturday.

Hope today has started gently for all. I managed to get an extra nap this morning but am still feeling a bit foggy despite having a lot to do. Might be a day for a 2nd coffee!

Take care all.

Still thinking of you too @Former-Member and hoping you are still safe from the fires in your area.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

There's always coffee @eth

It seems as if you have got a lot to do - and let's hope you can slow down and not overdo things and get over extended. Cutting your short list down to five sounds good - and it's not always the best resume that does the trick - maybe there is something in what a person admits almost casually that catches your eye - it's something to learn and this is the first day on the job so to speak - and then the interviews

We get it that you can't always be answers tags - it's great when you do - but doing this new task is pretty important and you want your support workers to be people you can improve the whole job performance with - you'll do great I am sure

We'll be looking forward to the weekend when you can post - and all the best with this new task - and there should be more coffee at the end of this email - yes - there is

Dec

Here you go - 2nd coffee

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Mr shaz just made me a coffee @Owlunar , @Mazarita , @eth , @Adge , @cutiepiekitty

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Great @Shaz51

A friend rang me after craft and said that I was not looking good enough and to get around there for coffee. We just sat watching tv, colouring, drinking coffee and even had choc biscuits! Inside was best at 41 degrees today. She even told me a couple things I have said to her that I really do not remember saying and that are worth thinking about, why some things make me feel certain ways.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth thinking of you 💕💕

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning to all passing here this morning.

Hi @Bunniekins @MDT @Owlunar @Shaz51 @outlander @cutiepiekitty @Molliex @Zoe7 @Teej @Faith-and-Hope I can see that you've all tagged me since yesterday. Sorry but I still haven't had time to go through messages and respond individually. If not today, then tomorrow.

I have support workers morning and afternoon today, hoping to get to chemist, groceries, art gallery (for inspiration to write something for the next live reading session there) this morning and then to my water tai chi this afternoon.

Plus I'm still in the midst of screening applicants for my ad for new support workers. 20 applicants in 2 days! Need to message all those on my short list, arrange times to have a phone interview, then arrange times for 'meet'n'greet' with the ones that still seem like a good match. And work out my calendar of exactly what time slots I need covered and who is available at those times. Phew!

Had a 2 hour meeting with my new coordinator of supports yesterday afternoon and one of the things we did was work out a list of questions for me to ask the potential new support workers so that will be useful.

At this stage my weekend is looking quiet so I should be able to catch up a bit here and have some chats.

Take care all and have a peaceful and productive day xx

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