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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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@Molliex wrote:

Hi @Owlunar, thanks for the thoughtful reply. Sorry to hear you're dealing with hayfever too. Here it's hot and windy, which is the worst for hayfever.

I saw my Dr. He's given me some suggestions for coping with the SH and is going to chat with my pdocs. Although I'm struggling, I'm lucky to have 3 great MH professionals working together to help. I just need to keep working on it and not give up 💜

Hope you have a lovely weekend


HI again @Molliex

I tend to start at the stop of the notifications and work down - maybe it's not the most best way of doing it so I missed this post ealier

Yes - hayfever is exhausting - a cold comes and stays and goes away - and that's the story but hayfever comes and goes and comes and goes and weeks can pass and we are always explaining to other people who have the same issue - it seems - hayfever is more socially acceptable than a bad cold or worse - the flu - but it can go on for so long.................... 0_l_]] - we often end up being totalled

I am really glad to hear you have a team of 3 MH professionals - that is excellent news - I have to say I have been very lucky when it has come to supportive professional people in my life - it makes a huge difference - we can work well with helpful people

The new psychologist I saw last week was like that - she is very enthusiastic and really feeds back that she has heard what I said - she will write a supportive report for the new pain specialist when I see him

Yes - it is stressful changing pain specialists but there are professionals out there who are less that user-friendly so it is encouraging to me to hear you have a good team

Keep up the good work Molliex - I am thrilled that you have joined the forum - you are very supportive with your posts

Dec

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Good morning @frog and still getting
over my short cruise from Sydney/Bris.
Might become a cruise addict! Enjoy your day, frog. Hugs from Bimby2.

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Hi @eth thanks for your kind mention in A long rave. I am finding today a bit overwhelming with emotion that is difficult to work out the source. Not sure what has led to it dont know why i feel so sh...

Always had that empathy thing ,like the song says "i feel the pain of everyone......' . That is literally how it feels from anger, sadness, and a lot in between. Learned how to work out what belongs to me and learned a clearing exercise to clear out what is not mine. Sometimes though i stuff up and get swept up in it. Stupidly i joined a dating site and got a kick out of views and messages. When i then followed with irl dates it was really underwhelming. We all have needs but i felt most people online just wanted to get physical and i felt like a piece of meat. Did meet and chat to people who seemed nice but it is hard to tell. Decided 2 cancel my subscription and maybe find groups with interests to join to meet friends or well... Not going to mince words find those who make life better and maybe physical. I am getting too old to ignore the time i have left and i dont want to waste my time with tyre kickers. Either get on in or go home sucker. Some of the guys i met found me to be confronting and there were some steamy chats and dates. But got really bored, have a low boredom threshhold. So guessing the emotion may be frustration or such like.

Anyway my community who have needs (those who are also me) decided we will move on and although we wont online date we may carefully seek what we need in safer climes. Who knew that complex mental health could also be trouble with getting intimate :).

So i think i better guard my craaazy self better but who knows it still may work out, i hope. And of course hear i lose my train of thought. Must be going through a tunnel. My daughter says i use humour as a cover when im upset. Shes probably right.

Cant change my CMH but just trying to get some fun and not hide as much. Trouble is i dont feel as in control of the community when i am with other people, but still a work in progress. Startng today i found a profile picture of one of my fav heros (calling her a heroine demeans her) wonder woman and i aim to treat my life now as she would a villain, head on.

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Good morning to all here today. A quiet and cool start here but heading to the farmers market in a while - will probably be a crowd there by the time we are.

@Appleblossom replying to your last post to me on SS yesterday - I didn't make it back there after sil and her mum came home. Sat out by the pool with cheese, crackers and a bottle of white with them. It's been a huge few weeks since their family member died and now that funeral and memorial service and sorting out the person's home and papers etc have happened they can slow down and have some peace.

Really glad you enjoyed the Ry Cooder. I'm starting my day with him today.

I love what you said about it being music when conversations flow.

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Hi @cutiepiekitty good on you for 20 laps at the pool. I wouldn't be able to do that, but I do go to a water tai chi class in a hydrotherapy pool twice a week. Exercising in water is so good for us. I also have problems that mean many other forms of exercise are impossible for me.

Hope your appointment goes well on Monday. For that sort of therapy I sometimes write a list of things I want to talk about, and sometimes have even handed my list to my psychologist or doctor when I walk in. Whenever I've done that they've thanked me and discussion has really stayed on track and been effective.

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Thanks @eth

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Hi and good morning to all here today. Hope it has started peacefully for you and progresses smoothly. Warm wishes to anyone struggling or feeling overwhelmed at the moment in the hope that today is one of the better ones for you, that you are finding the support you want both here and in your daily life.

@CheerBear @Teej @outlander @frog @Shaz51 @Appleblossom @Bunniekins @Adge @Owlunar @cutiepiekitty @LadyCaroline @Bimby2 @Molliex @Maggie @Former-Member @Sans911 @Snowie @Determined @Faith-and-Hope @MDT @TAB @Gazza75 @eudemonism @Sophia1 @Exoplanet @Scarecrowe @Razzle @Angels333 @Doglover @saturnzoon and so many more who I think of often but mind is still waking up today so sorry if I've missed you.

And tagging @Tinsel @Joy99 @Lise07 @Svety @Lyra_reachout @AKC2019 @Smacca @Herbmeister @Serenity_13 - welcome to the forums if you're new. This thread is partly a social one to meet new people and also a safe place to rave about anything you feel like, find some support and others with common ground. If you want to respond to a particular person type @ and then their name and you'll get a drop down box where you can click on their name.

Hope you enjoy and find the forums helpful. We're a very supportive and friendly bunch.

Today I was meant to have my 3rd driving lesson with the MH occupational therapist specialised instructor but it's been cancelled because of fires in the area where he lives. Which is also the area bro and sil have their community farm. The one guy who lives there all the time has said he doesn't want to leave while it's safe to do so, despite the rest of the group all wanting him to. Only one road out there. Plus my uncle's home is now cut off with the one road out blocked and fires very close. Thank goodness he got out a week ago - fires in his area going into the 3rd week now - and he will come to us tomorrow to wait it out. So we're all on high alert here even right in the centre of town, very smoky here this morning. Today is forecast to be hot and windy again - stay safe everyone. If you're in an area at risk please form a safety plan and organise whatever you need to take with you.

I'll be going to water tai chi later with my support worker but that's about it for today. I'm around for a while now if anyone wants to chat.

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