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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @octavia @asdf @Adge @Shaz51 hope today is starting more gently for you all.

Hearing you @octavia - it's no wonder things have worn you down with all that's happened the last couple of weeks. Crying a lot is no surprise, at least you are in touch with your own feelings again - it can be healthy to cry for a time - I always say "good weep > good sleep". But there comes a time where some self-care can help you get more balanced again.

@octavia and @asdf there are some threads where lots of different self-care activities are discussed - one is Re: what’s in your tool box ? another is Coping Box you can get some ideas there about passing the time whether feeling down or feeling elevated. I say passing the time because even that is a real achievement when we're having a rough day. They say 'one day at a time' but for me sometimes it's 10 minutes at a time, baby steps and remember to breathe (long, deep and slow).

@Adge love your memes again - they say a lot even when you don't. It'd be nice to catch up sometime soon if you feel like it xx

Sending warm wishes to all here. Take care xx

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning @Shaz51 and may your
day be a good one. Best wishes Bimby2.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning @octavia and may your
day go well. Bimby2.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

hey hello and hugs my @Bimby2

Hello @Bimby2 , @Mazarita , @eth , @Adge , @asdf xxxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning @Shaz51 @Bimby2 @Adge @asdf and all others here today. Hoping it is starting peacefully, that you feel refreshed from good rest, and that things go according to plan.

Hello also to @CheerBear @Zoe7 @outlander @Faith-and-Hope @frog @Teej @Maggie @Former-Member @Scarecrowe @Snowie @Sans911 @Gazza75 @Molliex @TAB @MDT @Exoplanet @Appleblossom @Former-Member @Former-Member @s-jay

Sitting with all who want some company and sending hugs to those who would like them.

Yesterday I had a really good meeting with my peer mentor that my support worker took me too. pm had asked to see my WRAP (wellness recovery action plan) so I spent a few hours updating it yesterday morning and typing it up. It was really good to revisit things like my wellness toolbox, plans for when things are changing, crisis plan, etc I've had mine since 2013 and it had scribble and whiteout all over it from times I've updated it over the years - was a mess. Now I've turned it into a computer document it will be much easier to update and also I'll be able to send it to people when I want to. Bro and sil had asked me to do this over 2 years ago so it's quite an achievement for me to finally have the computer skills to do it.

The meeting was so good. Getting to know each other better and finding just how much common ground we have, but also appreciating that we bring different skills and experience to the table. She is so encouraging. Asked me about plans for the next few years and then what my dreams are if anything was possible and money wasn't an issue. I realized that as much as I've progressed a lot over the last 2 1/2 years (since moving here and having real support), I am still basically surviving, not thriving yet - and I hardly know how to even have dreams. Lots for me to think about. We also talked about me wanting to work at some point in the future and what I see myself doing (even if it's voluntary). She is going to do my resume with me and said we will make it look beautiful! She also said she can see me as a workshop facilitator and presenter - which might be a good way for me to peer mentor - for which there is training available through the community disability alliance she is employed by, and paid work after doing the training ... so overall I came away from the meeting with a lovely feeling of hope about my future and that's so rare and precious. I want to hang onto it.

Have 2 sessions with support workers today - grocery shopping in the morning and then water tai chi in the afternoon. Should be back for the feast tonight.

Take care all, I care xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I loved this update @eth. It was absolutely brimming with positivity. I'm so happy for your progress 💚🌻

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @Molliex How's your day looking?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I'm not doing so well at the moment @eth . My SH is very bad, the meds just aren't right. I have hayfever quite badly today, thanks to all the jasmine everywhere! But on the positive side I am at work, it's Friday, and I have some nice things planned this weekend. I hope you have a great day ❤️

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

There are so many positives in this post of yours @eth ... very uplifting, so thank you for sharing.

Sherry 😊🌹

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hey @Molliex I can empathise where you are at, that was me a month ago. I found the crisis online chat lines very beneficial. I actually found the sane online chat helpful as they keep a record of your previous chats and can monitor your progress better. I'm here to listen too my friend, so use me .

Sending gentle hugs for your hurting body and mind (((💕💕💕💕)))

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