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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hey, @GieEuphoria I'm Jenn. Sounds like you're doing really well. Thank God for people like your sister and brother in law. 🙂 all the best for job hunting, if you get knocked back I know you can recover well and quickly and stronger every time 🙂 I know what it's like to be scared of failure, I'm about to start back at a job when semester finishes that I had to cut short my placement at because I was really unwell. I believe you ❤️

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @GieEuphoria @Bimby2 @Adge @Jenn4 and anyone else around here today. Hope it's starting gently for you all.

@GieEuphoria I moved to a cabin in my bro and sister-in-law's back yard a little over 2 1/2 years ago and my life has steadily improved ever since. It's so amazing when family takes you in and really gives you the support you want in a gentle way, encourages you towards goals, and keeps you safe. I still can't quite believe I'm here at times, compared to where I was at for decades before asking for their help.

Best wishes with getting back to work. So good that you are able to give it a shot. I'm not ready for that yet, still working on being able to go out alone and recently started driving lessons towards that goal.

Hope your start back at work goes really well too @Jenn4

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi Good Morning @eth and may your day be a pleasant one. Best wishes.
Bimby2.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Same to you too @Bimby2

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita Hey Mazzy I wonder how you are going. I hope you are doing well and keeping busy. It is funny how time goes by. It has been ages since we have seen you but we all keep our Mazzy in our hearts :). I have been okay. Up and down but mostly up lately which is good. It would be great to have a update maybe for new years on how things have been for you. eth is holding the fort brilliantly and your threads live on.

Just know that we love you Mazzy. Your peaxxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Morning all @Bunniekins @Adge @Bimby2 @CheerBear @Zoe7 @Shaz51 @frog @Teej @Gazza75 @MDT @TAB @Adge @Scarecrowe @Ant7 @octavia @saturnzoon @Exoplanet @Sophia1 @Faith-and-Hope @Bill16 @Meowmy @Doglover @Queenie @Jacques @Owlunar @simontemplar @JosRapp @GieEuphoria @BlueBay @Angels333 @oceangirl @utopia @Snowie @Sans911 @cutiepiekitty @Judi9877 @eudemonism @Appleblossom @Maggie @Former-Member @outlander @Molliex @SleepyDad @emg_1 @Maxi7 and anyone who sees this who I didn't manage to tag - I'd love to hear from some of you that I haven't caught up with for a while. Hoping today is one of the better ones for all of us. Mine will be tricky, I know that already.

I have another driving lesson (no. 2) this morning and am seriously hoping there's not too much traffic chaos out there with it being cup day. Normally it's one of the 2 days a year that I boycott the world (an anniversary of a sad time for me) so it will be an extra challenge for that reason. With my psychologist's advice I changed the lesson plan they wanted me to do, so at least it will be an hour, not 1 1/2 hours.

Had a huge admin day yesterday so am feeling somewhat more on top of things today which is nice. And good that my mind will be clear-ish during the driving lesson. Very glad to hear from my support worker that she will be here this week. She's expecting a grandbaby to arrive any minute and will be away for a week when that happens. So I'm having to stay organised a week in advance for any needs just in case, she won't have much notice if it does happen. Just emphasises the point that I need to add one or two more support workers to my team. My new coordinator of supports will help me to source them in the near future.

Wanting to squeeze in some more writing this week as I am starting with a new writing group on Sunday afternoon. My bridge partner friend has invited me to join her group. Looking forward to connecting with more new people which is a great feeling after so much social phobia for so many years.

Between now and then I have water tai chi twice, psychology, grocery shopping and chemist, a meeting with my peer mentor, a trip to the art gallery for some writing inspiration - a bit each day but still feels like a busy time to me. going out most days is still relatively new and very tiring even when some of the activities are actually enjoyable.

So that's my catch up rave. Look forward to reading some of yours too. Please tag me if you post in other threads. Take care all, I care xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth Hey eth you are doing so well coping with everything that you are doing atm. You are so busy and as for the driving lessons you go girl! I dont understand the hype of Melbourne Cup either. I dont even register it is on half the time lol except it is around my sisters birthday otherwise it would be just another day.

I must try water tai chi. I know where I plan to go swimming with support worker they do classes of some description so manybe it is tai chi .... I hope so although I doubt it lol.

Have a great day and I hope the traffic is calm and peaceful for your lesson. Love peaxx

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