FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Our stories

A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

23,501 - 23,510 of 27,230

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth A local nursery let us pick what we needed for free. 😍😍😍Friends of friends drop some off. Find some out walking. A bit obsessed with it sometimes, but good for the mind.💕💕

Ive never worked with paint before either, but dotting, if you like it, is easy.

You can check out mandala rock painting online if you’d like. You can also do it on canvas. @CheerBear and I have some pic up in craft corner. Don’t know how to do the direct here thing.. 🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Maggie 💕💕

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hey @Adge @TAB I think this might be about your era too : Let's relive the 1980's

It's great fun!

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hey everone can I join in :)? I dont have permanent inking but if I did it would be a pheonix rising from the ashes 😄

In the meantime I scribble on my arms at times. Some of my scribbles have been 'Let them judge you, let them misunderstand you. Let them gossip about you..... their opinions arent your problem you stay kind, commited to love and free in your authenticity. No matter what they do or say every day brings a new dawn of peace :)'

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth I did it. I made the call. took 5 police officers and 2 ambulances. he's put holes in every wall. they had to sedate him twice. mental health assessments tomorrow. he's a cunning little bugger. wouldn't surprise me if he talks his way out of it

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@octavia take pictures of the holes in the walls. Tell them how stressed you all are and that you need help with your son and that he can be cunning with hiding his illness whilst he is being interviewed only to lash out later at home.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@octavia well done! If it took so much for them to be able to take him in I think he will probably be kept and scheduled for at least a few days - that's probably the first thing you need to find out when you can. If he's in as a voluntary admission things might take a different course. Has he ever been admitted to hospital for MH or drugs before?

Sending you loads of strength to keep pushing for him to be treated. Hoping very much that your husband and his mother are working as a team with you about this. And that the hospital communicates well with you all about what's happening at their end. I agree with @Bunniekins about recording whatever evidence you are able to for future use if needed. Including police report numbers. Having them made a big difference when I had to take action with my then teenage child.

Hope you are able to find some calm this afternoon and definitely know you have done the right thing for all involved. Take care.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

And @Bunniekins of course it's fine for you to join in here anytime as far as I'm concerned. I like the idea of writing/drawing on yourself as a type of affirmation for you to see while you need it, but be able to remove if you want to. There are a couple of situations I've been in where I didn't want anyone to know I had the tats, but it's easy enough to wear a shirt that covers them. I like the sound of the messages you've used.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Bunniekins can we be there for the assessment? I don't need to take photos, police and ambos saw it all. will stil take some. he's knocked out cold right now. ughh I'm hating tomorrow already

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@octavia @Bunniekins I'm so glad you found each other on the forums. I might have to disappear soon as it sounds and looks like the storm is getting close. Will be thinking of you @octavia and sending you all the strength possible to get through tonight and tomorrow.

23,501 - 23,510 of 27,230