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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hope you feel better @Bunniekins . Been a bit cool over here.

I didn't get much of anything done today after not much sleep for 2 nights. Went to a friend for coffee this afternoon. Hope I can get sleep tonight. Only had 2-3 hrs each last 2 after seeing B and going bad places. Started going through things too much. When no sleep the brain does not go too well and the body hurts too with the arthritis. Had some panic attacks too. Been writing lots in my book to try and get the brain to stop and clear but that is only helping while I do it then it keeps spinning. And I don't like the bad things going around my head. B said that I definitely have CPTSD and am going to need a lot to get through. I already knew I needed lots of help though.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

My son2 has really pushed my buttons tonight, with playing to rough with my youngest all I can hear is my youngest telling him no and to stop as he's hurting him, cause my older son took my youngest chocolates that he had left, then I started shouting at them both to stop, but youngest can't once he's revved up he can't stop for a long time, I tried to get in between but youngest picked up the broom to hit older one, but he put it back down, so I turned my tv all the way up so I couldn't hear them. Youngest said he's not going to school tomorrow now as older one ripped my youngest poster he just brough home from school, had to take meds to calm down, it has stopped now but I'm so angry and just want to lash out.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hey sweet pea @Bunniekins I've been feeling quite mentally unwell lately .

I actually didn't mind the warmer weather.

My psychiatrist is going to change my medication to see if that makes any difference.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@saturnzoon How are things this morning? Your situation sounds very tough, I really don't have any experience with this. But I do have a friend who is a counselor who had 3 boys and she used to do exactly what you did and shut the door on the fighting and just carry on with her own thing. So you did the right thing in the moment.

Could you also try 'I feel ' discussions with them when they're calm. I.e. When you fight I feel anxious and bad inside....... it's a DBT skill about expressing your emotions.

I'm sorry you had a tough evening, I hope you get some peace today.

Love Angels333

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Shaz51 @Angels333 @saturnzoon @cutiepiekitty @Zoe7 @Sophia1

& to anyone else ive possibly missed just spread the word.

If ur having financial struggles u can contact ur energy retailers gas & elec & apply for a home energy emergency Assistance scheme application form.

Ive only just found out about it.

Could have helped me out many times in my past.

Dont c my Psychologist til next wk so i shouldnt b upset this weekend.

Hope u all enjoy ur weekend

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Doglover @MDT

@outlander @Judi9877 @Appleblossom

@Maggie

@frog

@Mollie

@eudemonism

@Meowmy

If ur having financial struggles u can contact ur energy retailers gas & elec & apply for a home energy emergency Assistance scheme application form.

Ive only just found out about it.

Could have helped me out many times in my past.

Dont c my Psychologist til next wk so i shouldnt b upset this weekend.

Hope u all enjoy ur weekend

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Former-Member take care,have a good weekend

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

hello @Former-Member , @Meowmy , @Angels333 , @saturnzoon

we have friday feast on tonight if you like to join us xxx

any plans for the weekend @Former-Member

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Shaz51

Tossing if i want to go to meditation class tonight or stay in.

Im having a very lazy day & enjoying it actually.

My computer wouldnt start yesterday so i had to get it fixed today.

A little set back but u get that.

Im going to see a play tomorrow arvo. The local ameteur theatre & musicals here r well supported by the locals.

Theyre very reasonably priced also

I didnt go out much living sth cause it was too cold & everything was so far away.

Where i live now its only 10mins to everything.

Weather has started to warm up here.

Im preparing for the fly season which is huge here.

Got a fly trap outside, bought binkill which ive only just found out about. Also a battery automatic spray.

So im well armed lol

Might go to the beach on the weekend also & chillout with a book

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@saturnzoon

Sounds exhausting! Glad ive only got one kid.

U cant get away when the stress is inside ur own home too.

Really hope tomorrow is easier for u

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