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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

i am thinking lots of you @Angels333 xxx

hello @Faith-and-Hope , @Mazarita , @eth , @MDT

I purree chicken and spaghetti for my mum and mr shaz is laughing soooo much about it ,that i don`t think it is funny anymore xxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

You are such a caring person @Shaz51 I'm sure you know what she needs. And no, it's not funny, I agree with you.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

No that's not funny @Shaz51 It's still tasty, & a necessary thing (I imagine).

I would happily eat it myself (without the chicken).

Adge

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

it does taste nice @Adge , @eth , @Faith-and-Hope

mum will be happy with it i know my friends xoxo

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Keep it up @Shaz51
My awesome cool friend 😎

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Spent quite a while re-reading the Managing Bipolar 1 thread. So much I had forgotten. So weird how my memory for more recent stuff just blocks chunks of time. Frustrating and at times embarassing.

Miss you @Mazarita you taught me so much.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Reading background info & other people's experience is often helpful @eth

I don't have Bipolar, so cannot relate to that - I still have some knowledge about it, especially from other people.

For me it's complex Trauma & complex PTSD reading, that is the most helpful (in that sense).

Stimulants don't wire me up (at all) - I'm on prescription stimulants, for daily fatigue (from Sleep Apnea).

My fatigue would not respond to (wasn't improved by) any other treatment.

The stimulants only slightly improve my functioning.

Adge

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Oh well, my Date just cancelled our meeting (for tomorrow morning) @Bunniekins @eth @Shaz51 @Former-Member

That's happened every time, since I started dating again.

I shall have to see if she actually does want to re-schedule (or not).

Sometimes it's been no, that's the end of contact (before ever actually meeting).

Since it's often the highlight (focus) of my weekend - I won't pretend that it's not a downer, when cancelled.

Adge

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Adge Hey Adge I am so sorry that she cancelled. It just wasn't meant to be. That doesn't mean there isnt a potential mrs finch out there looking for her mr finch. Just don't give up hope and be like my son2 and keep being positive and keep putting yourself out there. We all think you are wonderful lots of love always peaxxxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Adge very sorry to hear your date cancelled. Try not to take it personally, they were interested enough in you to plan it in the first place and it could be they're nervous or something came up in their life. I think you're so brave to be looking for someone this way and I'm sure Ms Right will come along one day. If you don't have a dream how can you make it come true?

Re the stimulants - if they work for you that's all that matters, good to hear you have your Dr's support with them. Sleep apnoea must be hard. I'm awake several times every night myself so I understand the lethargy factor. And you go to work during the day so you need to be switched on. I don't work so am able to rest here and there during the day.

Hope today has some good bits in it for you.

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