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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Meowmy yes it was delicious thank you :Dxxx

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@TAB Hello, better focus on what we can do to improve our circumstances. Can’t fight your sister, too much waste energy and money and likely to end up with not much. Work well, enjoy if we can. Will get a bit of inheritance. May be can get a little flat somewhere.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

yeah so much energy wasted on that already @Meowmy yeah a flat or get tent and caravan/campervan and just drive around

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@TAB We keep look after each other and ourselves. Things will work out. Not easy with so much worries re job, friendships, losing mum to old age, brother hates me, even I never bothered with the inheritance issue, my worst fear, to be left alone in the world when mum goes. For a girl, no connections, no family, no friend real scary.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

well it might sound childish but maybe you could just ignore each other re brother @Meowmy well mostly. yeah I dont really have any friends have some aquaintances but they all have own agendas etc so yeah, I like being alone but take it way too far think. Only people I talk to are at work and serving at shops

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@TAB That’s probably best approach. So I don’t expect his support with my issues and don’t take on his problems. May be you can find some bits of support from work, better than none.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

well support can come in different ways @Meowmy they support me in a way and money gives freedom and less stress cos can pay bills or god forbid go on a holiday

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@TAB I find it real scary to be alone in the world. When it comes, I may be OK. just live on. May be because I have been very sick.without care and support, I couldn't get back up. Still all the mess since my last breakdown just lie there not sorted. May take some time to get confident again.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

take it easy on yourself @Meowmy

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@TAB @Mazarita @Meowmy @Appleblossom @outlander @CheerBear @eth @Zoe7 @Alacarte @BryanaCamp @Adge @Angels333 and everyone who passes today on this fabulous Monday.Well this rolly poley pea better head off in a couple of hours for her walk as son2 has been spoiling her all weekend with goodies and of course I couldn't resist. Plus ex came with goodies so I had no hope :o!

Special shout out for Angels333 haven't heard how you are going for a long time. Hoping everything is okay at your end.

And shout out for Alacarte hoping you have your sparkling water urges under control. Am thinking of you and wishing you the best.

Love to all greenpeaxxx

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