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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I never got a letter like that @Bunniekins The LAC who did my planning meeting just rang me and went through it over the phone, so all I had was the notes I managed to make during that call. On my actual plan it's hard to translate into plain english. Have had to rely on my CoS's interpretation, which I think is influenced by what services she actually knows about - she didn't even know about plan management when I started with her.

Lately I've been trying to get my sw's to use item numbers that no-one's been claiming under so that I don't lose those funds. My plan expires the 1st week of July and I feel like I should already be organising what I can for it.

Hope you go into your meeting feeling strong and clear about it all, and of course read the fine print before signing - just sayin'!

Sorry I haven't done your reading yet - waiting to be in the right frame of mind for it. It will happen before too long.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth thanks eth and np re reading just when you are up for it :)xxxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

hi @Bunniekins hope your meeting with ndis goes well. I'm very, very private too, although I do struggle with fatigue & cookery & meal prep, so maybe meal prep could be nice? I hope you feel comfy with the results anyways, you deserve good support.

Thank you for your kinds words, they mean a lot to me.

hi @eth well done on looking after a sick dog, I would have been so anxious about that, monitoring is all consuming, I hope you enjoy your water tai chi today & your amazing garden. thanks for your support

best wishes to all on the thread

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good Luck with ndis @Bunniekins

Good thinking re item numbers @eth

Just doing a big slow cook up.

Did not make group this morning. Forgave myself as in recovery of prn and retriggering on weekend. Sent email. Hope they understand.

Never had the luxury of being private ... in ooooh so many ways ... that I am just coming to terms with....Neither did dad, I guess. Whereas mother was overcontrolling about her individual rights to privacy. What is in Public Domain and Private Domain is not automatic or the same for all people. I have personally struggled with those issues a lot, as finding ways of being socially appropriate in a constantly changing social environment.

Usually get very paranoid and insecure but cover it up when people talk about best friends and loyalty and values around relationships. cos I am usually not included, its probably a consequence of being out in the big circus of life from far too young. However last night 2 people I have known for over 10 years made "friend" statements to me and 2 newer acquaintances ones also did.

Helps me manage feelings re being triggered about feelings and deaths on Saturday at the big Concert. It was the choir I sang Requiem with for most recent death of immediate family member (youngest bro). I guess that is part of the reason why I was open to such a huge triggering .... when directly confronted by bullying bossy britches, who was just full of herself and had no idea.

SO slowly getting back to being a composed apple.

That music video felt mildly comforting @TAB it touched quietly on my Irish heritage, music and tragedy of suicide and next videos on search engine were about Delores on Dutch tv. So funny closure. Touching on the serious real stuff. Just being positive is so annoying. I prefer real. Thx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

sounds like youve got a bit going on @Appleblossom I need a tap on my forehead and have the most shocking cough, having to stay home for the rest of the week

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Sometimes the body makes its own mind up ... and ya gotta pay attenshun @TAB

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

well its been threatening for nearly 2 weeks @Appleblossom just sick as today

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Bunniekins @eth Couldn't come on this morning as I am taking too long to get moving and ready for work - but got your messages at work later. Hope you had a great walk this morning little pea and that you enjoyed tai chi Eth - I know you have missed it over the past few weeks so would have been great to be back there.
Going to take a walk around forum land but sending you both some hugs for this afternoon.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hey @Zoe7 I've replied to you on F & A thread.

@Appleblossom really nice to hear about the 'friend statements' you've been getting and that the dust is settling after the weekend's challenges with bossy boots.

@BryanaCamp hope things are going well for you atm.

@Bunniekins wondering if you'll be around later tonight? I've done that reading we talked about - what I've written on paper is quite lengthy, not sure where to put it on here. Might make a new thread and tag you when I type it up. Wondering if you thought of a particular question you wanted to ask to focus on. Will try to get onto typing it up later tonight.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth Hi eth am here now and will be for a lil while yet. Am really tired today. I have tried to think of a question but without much luck. I will think some more.

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