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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I like @eth's suggestion to do your shopping online @Adge - would save you a trip but you would get what you need. I do prefer to pick out my own fruit and veggies though and don't often get them from one of the main supermarkets ...and they are cheaper at the fruit and veggie shop too.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Goodnight @eth Hope you have a calm evening and can get a good sleep Hon

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

No @Adge it was really getting diagnosed with bipolar 1 after many years and needing to learn to manage that. Plus compassion fatigue. For the last several years I've just done friends and family - not very often at all. I am just starting to have a bit of osteo in my thumb joints but it's not too bad.

I'm going now - take care til we speak again.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Yes the vegies would be cheaper (maybe better) from the fruit & vegie shop @Zoe7

I have to confess, I get mine from the supermarket.

There is a market open on the W/E - I find it too busy & crowded.

Adge

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

SOme of the things at the fruit and veggies shop are cheaper and of good quality - especially the fruit @Adge The staples like potatoes and carrots are definitely cheaper - when it comes to anything green they are actually (usually) better quality at the supermarket - mainly because they are sold in larger amounts and therefore some are wasted because I can't eat them all that quickly.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth Hi eth and good morning :). Ex came super early with a bunch of flowers lol (very nice of him). We spoke for ages about this and that and he mentioned he is very concerned about me. He wants me to have a life (his words). I said that I am working on it lol but that it is hard because of my mi. He then became very apologetic about what he did in the past. He bares so much guilt about how he treated me I always say it is alright as I don't like to carry grudges but I can see that it weighs heavily on him.

When he took daughter up the road for a coffee I vacuumed son2's bedroom and washed up. Son2 came back from being out with carer (saw the movie Little) which he thoroughly enjoyed (it is a comedy and the trailer looked great). Then ex took son2 off. I slept alot yesterday was feeling really tired that is why I didn't say much last night was exhausted.

I am surprised that boofhead has a cat thought it would be to cerebral for him but there you go. Hope for him yet. Am pleased he apologised to you but agree with you that the proof will be in the pudding re his behaviour during this month as to whether he can control his temper outbursts or not. Very hard for drunks to do.

Today I will walk up the road with daughter buy the newspapers and go to a cafe. Very civilized. Oh before I forget the first thing my ex said to me way that I have lost some weight!!!!! :):):) Gave him a big kiss for that !

Hope you a super pea day eth. Love greenpea xxxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning and a very happy Sunday for @Mazarita @Zoe7 @Adge @eth @TAB @CheerBear @Appleblossom @BryanaCamp @Exoplanet and all who pass have a super pea Sunday :). I am off with daughter this morning for coffee and then a calm and 'pea'ceful day ahead with a few household jobs before son2 comes home.

No major news and as they say no news is good news :). Have fun today. love greenpea xxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@TAB Hey TAB 🙂 is this your last day?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hey little pea. I am up at silly o'clock again @Bunniekins Definitely going to have another sleep this morning but for now I am wide awake. I will most like stay up now until I feed the furbabies then sleep again after that. Your day sounds like it will be lovely and 'pea'ceful. I am supposed to be driving to my parent's place this afternoon to feed their dogs but haven't heard from my father so not sure if that is happening. No doubt he will ring me later - probably when I am asleep lol

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Zoe7 Well I am glad that you are up and about :D. I wonder why you are up so early. It is not like you. I bet the fur babies like it though. I know my bunny does. He loves it when I am up at ungodly hours because it means more treats for him lol.

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