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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Yes you must have needed it my sister

I hope your mum's recovery isn't too long but at her age it is likely to be a little longer than usual. She is tough though and has you for support so she has that in her favour also @Shaz51

Been a very quiet afternoon for me - struggling a bit with a headache but have now taken pain meds to help. I need to do some things for work for the next couple of days so that will take up some time tonight.

Toby and Cat are fed and happy and it is still a nice day outside so Cat has gone back out to sit in the sun. When do you get to see Smoky again?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

glad you had a quiet afternoon my sister @Zoe7 but I hope the head ache goes away very quickly xx

saw smoky on friday , The owners have made a sitting area outside with plants and pavers on the ground , with a table and chairs , there are soo many things to see like gnomes, crocodiles , a boat a water feature, fairies, lots of ornaments around and Smoky thinks they made it for him

we have been having 40 degrees days up here during the week , soo good to see some rain this afternoon

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Wow more hot weather @Shaz51 That is hard to work in

I love that Smoky thinks that the area is just for him - I bet he looks super cute sitting amongst all the ornaments too Cat is much like that with her room - it is a totally Toby free zone so she knows she is safe in there and can have her own space without a little white fluffball getting in her face lol

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

yes it has been hard mowing in the heat @Zoe7 , soo we do a couple at a time , and we are going to lose some soon and won`t be putting any new ones on

That is good for Cat xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

It must be hard to keep up when you have so much going on too @Shaz51 I bet Mr. Shaz is happy that you are cutting back on the work though.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I was pre-booked for a massage yesterday - which the massage person cancelled (via sms), with no explanation.

So that's why I was trying, this morning to get a massage elsewhere (which I finally did).

As I've been reminded by several people (recently) - when given bad service (no service), most people just "take their business elsewhere".

My neighbour just popped over very briefly - to tell me that her 83 year old Mum's Hernia surgery has not gone well. She has an infection & complications.

My neighbour was initially reluctant to tell me about it - because her Mum's Hernia surgery (with insertion of mesh in tummy), is exactly the same surgery that I will be having in just over 1 week's time.

She still has a permanent Stoma (& bag) - whereas I got rid of mine, with my last surgery (3 & 1/2 years ago).

My thoughts are with you & your Mum too @Shaz51

Adge

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

thanks @Zoe7 , @Adge

I bet Mr. Shaz is happy that you are cutting back on the work though.-- he sure is

and the other reasons are , mr shaz shoulder and MI appts

also my problems

hugs @Adge

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Shaz51

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

You both definitely have a lot to deal with @Shaz51 so it is probably a really good thing you are cutting back on the work. You have to take care of yourself first my sister

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Zoe7 @Mazarita @Adge @Shaz51 @eth @outlander @Exoplanet @Shaz51 @CheerBear @Appleblossom and everyone am up super early cauz nature called and now am wide awake!!!!:o (don't you hate that). If anyone is awake would love a talk :). greenpea xxx

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