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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Yayyyy @Mazarita The chance of chatting with you my friend. That and nearly 7 hrs sleep in 3 naps - better than average.

How are things going for you?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Awww, hugs, @eth. Really glad to see you here tonight too. ox

Great to hear you are better rested than usual. Me about the same as has been happening lately.

Things are going mostly well with me really, except for it being an extended period now of very little sleep. I feel exhausted when not actively engaged at the computer, and often find myself waking up with a jolt from tiny involuntary naps in the armchair. Quite a number of times I've woken up with my phone-tablet still in my hand, in the middle of a game of spider solitaire. That game is something I use to wind myself down from other computer stuff. I've blinked and gone to sleep on quite a number of occasions doing it lately!

Saw my psychologist yesterday, a great session, my psychiatrist not long ago, and my GP on Monday. Feeling well supported in my semi-mania.

I've been reading what you've been doing and planning in posts you have tagged me in. I was really pleased especially to read that you are upping your activities as you are becoming more accustomed to the higher level of engagement with the world.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Oh well @Mazarita I guess micro-naps are better than no naps at all. I've had periods in my life where that was all I got too, I would zone out completely even sitting up with something in my hands e.g. b-ng!! And then wake with a start but manage not to drop or spill anything. Maybe you could think of them as power naps, like yogis have. Do you ever lie down and just do some breathing with your eyes shut? Sometimes it works for me. A sleep specialist once told me that doing that is almost as good for us as actually sleeping. Glad to hear you're feeling well supported by your care team at this time.

I will be adding bridge lessons on Monday morning and a 2nd tai chi class on Friday afternoons to my weekly routine. So I'll only have Sunday and Thursday at home all day. I want to keep Thurs free as it's the day after psychology and I want to be able to process stuff as it percolates after seeing her. And Sunday will be a time to do something with family or gardening or whatever.

Psychologist has been cancelled by her for today so I have 5 1/2 hrs to do something with my support worker. Might go explore an area that's said to be a women's place traditionally a bit south of here. Might go to the hypermarket as I like to call it and look for a couple of things I want before that. Might try to catch a Shebah cab again (haven't done it for about 2 months or more).

Are you getting out at all?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita Quite disappointed about the psychologist cancelling this week as I've had a couple of really tricky things happening since I last saw her. You might have seen where I'd read an article that really brought up a lot of stuff, putting it in a new light that was scary.

That and increasing anxiety about when the fam here goes o/s for a month in mid April. It's starting to look like sil's bro might be staying at her mum's house next door and that's a really mixed bag for me. He's just detoxed from booze and val*&m and who knows what else (after being caught high-range dui and a court case) down south and would possibly come here to get his life together again. I've heard too many stories about him playing up. On the other hand he would look after the house next door instead of me.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Exploring the womens place today sounds like it would be wonderful, @eth. Hope that's something that happens. Second water tai chi class seems like a great idea, as you are liking it so much. Cool that the bridge lessons are something that have continued in your step by step plans. Makes sense to have a day off after the intensity of psych sessions, and weekend day with family is lovely. Only having one day per week completely to yourself is quite a difference to where you were not that long ago. Wonderful that your progress has been so steady and continues to advance in the same balanced way.

I'm not doing any meditation activities, but am breathing deeply when I think of it. If I lie down at all I fall asleep. Having no problems with that at the moment! Staying asleep is another matter. I'm finding my drive to create and work on related projects to be an unstoppable force at the moment. I'm not quite sane enough really to do things like meditation and wouldn't be able to maintain the focus on it before my mind flew away and I was up again at the computer.

Yes, I am getting out, though I'm often going several days without doing that. The main thing that's been getting me into the shower and out of the flat is appointments for medical and psych matters. There's been quite a few of them lately and it's felt good to be out in the world for them too.

But tomorrow I'm making another bus trip to the country town where my recent-ish friends live. We are creative collaborators too and have projects to discuss further and do things for. This will be my second trip to visit them on the bus. I love that little town too and am very much looking forward to the visit. They are people who are barely into computing, so aside from the creative stuff we will be working on, there will be heaps of just regular life stuff too, a good respite for me, I'm hoping.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I don't even call it meditation @Mazarita I just lie there, often counting my breath in to 4 out to 4.... but it sounds like maybe you are able to get some sleep here and there and that you're quite enjoying this period of productivity anyway.

Your trip to the country sounds like it well may be a really lovely time. You seem more adventurous these days.

Not sure how much longer I'll last here as I do want to get a bit more sleep if I can.

Really glad we caught up this morning.

Keep on keeping on girl!!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I'm not sure I did read about the article you read, @eth. Understand your hesitations about family being away for a month, and sil's bro possibly staying next door. If that happens, it will be good to have him looking after the house. Hope that however it goes, it works out well for you.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I put a link to the article in a conversation with CB a few pages back @Mazarita . It's called 'hidden bruises' and is about possible brain consequences of something that's happened to me twice. Really rattled me. I need to discuss it with my psychologist. I wasn't sure about sharing it but decided to in the end.

Heading back to bed now. Have a good day lovely xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Sending good wishes for patience and calm while waiting to talk to your psych about it, @eth. Wonderful to chat this morning. Sleep well and wake refreshed. ox

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning all 🙂

@Mazarita and @eth enjoyed reading through your brief chat this morning (in the non-creepy way we read through chats here 😉). Great you could both catch up in real time.

@Mazarita I hope getting out to the country is as good for you as it was the last time you went. So great to hear you're feeling well supported during this time. Hope your sunrise was a pleasant one, if you caught it 😊

@eth can very much understand your disappointment at your psych appointment being canceled, especially after the difficult feelings you had reading that article. I too had some challenging feelings about it that kind of bubbled away throughout that night and into the next day, though perhaps for different reasons to you. It would have been very helpful to be able to work through some of that with your psych this week. How would you feel about bringing it up with a support worker? Is that something you could talk with them about? Understanding hugs for you and listening eyes ready if it might help to vent or chat ❤

@Adge thinking of you with the difficulties you're having. Can only imagine the kind of stress you might be experiencing and how complicated it might be to have attempted to resign and then retract your resignation. Hearing you with the challenges of working within a system and in a field that you find difficult to be part of. Part of my ongoing struggle to return to study is that I don't know whether I could tolerate working in the kinds of roles I had my dreams and hopes of doing anymore. While I appreciate the individuals who are part of it all, I'm not sure I can be part of something that has hurt me so badly before. It causes a real internal conflict at times for me. I hope you can find a more peaceful place soon.

@Shaz51 big hugs for your tired and aching ❤

Hi to everyone else who might pass by this lovely corner of the forum 👋

I have a busy-for-me-lately day today. I'm away as I needed the kids minded for a GP appointment this morning and a counselling appointment this afternoon, which I'll return home for soon. I'm looking forward to my GP appointment as I'm hoping to discuss and start looking into what might be causing some tired flatness I've been experiencing lately. Not so keen on counselling as I found it quite triggering last time and was a bit unsettled afterwards, though I think the topics we touch on are important to work through so I'll go along today. I have a night without smaller people tonight and depending on how I'm feeling I may catch up with my friend tonight, though there's a chance I may not want to do that after my second appointment. I've had a few nights without my crew these holidays and am really thankful for it. I'm sure it has helped me get through them easier than I have in the past. Not long to go until school returns now.

❤ for all for the day ahead
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