FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Our stories

A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

16,641 - 16,650 of 27,230

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good on you for getting out there @Adge. I'm not as brave as you - think of it as dipping your toes in the water - eventually you'll get all the way in and swim x

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I'm getting a long delay before notifications come through @Former-Member - wondering what's happening behind the scenes.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

hi @eth

I can't notice anything different, I will keep an eye on it, thank you for pointing it out.

SP

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Morning everyone 👋

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @SleepyPanda I'm having to go to 'latest posts' to see them at all.

Good morning @outlander

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Adge Good on you Adge as you say at least you went out and gave it a go. I think you are very brave and I am sure there will be a miss finch out there who is waiting for you so never give up hope 🙂

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hey @Bunniekins how's your today going?

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@ethJust woke up from a cat nap and am feeling alot better. Might tackle some gardening today but again might not 😛

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth the thing with gardening is you need to shower afterwards and I am not in the mood to shower I want to stay a bit grotty :P:P What have you got on this afternoon?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Ha ha @Bunniekins Girls like to play in the mud sometimes too. Cant believe every nursery rhyme ya hear.!

@eth Thanks. It will be a long path with twists and truns, but it made sense. My psychologist was frightened there wouldbe another major crisis. We will take a step at a time. It simply makes a difference when we know what our child is struggling with. If kept in the dark, and just have to shoulder random blowouts without context, its more difficult, and a waste of time, resources and love and life.

@TAB I knew wotcha meant. You like to be the witty one and chipper. There are times in everyone's life when that aint possible. Still you wont regret giving up cigs and I hope other stuff rolls along alright for you. You gave me quality attention for a while and I made the most of it. Off to rocknroll camp today.

I am used to getting by on an oily rag.

That said I had a great "rider" conversation at the party and saw an amazing folio with half human half critter drawings like your pic. I suggested he also spend time at the zoo and get some real life input. The artist liked that idea.

Cheers ALL

Gotta go

16,641 - 16,650 of 27,230