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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Watched a little of the video @Appleblossom - he is a good speaker and very knowledgeable for sure and relateable. Will watch a little more of it later - my concentration isn't great this afternoon - a bit tired.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Sorry you are tired. @Zoe7 Still nice to have contact with you today.

Hope you like it when you get to it.

In aspie speek ... one of my special interests could be mental illness ... lol ....

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

It is such a lovely day here today @Appleblossom and I am missing out on it because I am too tired but it is okay because I feel okay about my day yesterday and Toby and Cat are giving me lots of cuddles today - both of those things are making it ok for me to relax and get things done in my own time.

lol One of your special interests could be mental illness - think many of us fall under that category then Apple

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning all! Wondering if anyone's around or all busy with life.

@Mazarita @Zoe7 @Appleblossom @Bunniekins @CheerBear and anyone else passing by.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Morning @eth. I'm having a slow and quiet morning this morning. How are you going?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @CheerBear slow and peaceful here too so far. Planning a skype with adult child and their family in a little while. Put the washing away before logging on but no other plans for today so far. How are you? I read elsewhere that you're starting a new crochet project - what are you making this time?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Slow and peaceful is a great way to start the day @eth 🙂 Skype session sounds pretty great also. Is adult child still going OK adjusting to having an extra, new little person?

I'm a bit up and down (and hit and miss here because of that) lately but am OK enough at the moment thanks. I'm making, or trying to make, a little amigurumi (small yarn creature) creation.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@CheerBear Yes they're going ok mostly. And bub is now over 5kg and starting to roll already - 8 weeks old. My time with them was too short so I really appreciate it when we get to skype. Miss 4 1//2 is so chatty these days and excited to be going to pre-school at the 'big school' next year.

I've seen a few of those mini creatures - intricate work - such a mindful activity. I crochet too but rarely these days. Had to watch youtube videos to remind me of the stitches. Probably couldn't follow a pattern at this stage, but will again in future. I used to make a lot of hats and would like to make one for baby. Miss 4 1/2 still wears the one I made for her.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Far out that time went quickly @eth! Do you get to see bub often when you Skype? They'd be growing and changing quickly at this age. 4 and a half is a pretty cute age! That's great that she's excited about big school next year 🙂

Crochet is my best escape, calming activity and distraction. I especially enjoy it when I come across a pattern or project that's a nice balance between challenging enough to keep me thinking, but not too hard that it becomes frustrating. My kids have quite a few things I've made them that they enjoy including beanies 🙂

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@CheerBear I started a purple scarf early last year's winter and haven't finished it still LOL! Doing the same stitch row after row passed the time but didn't challenge or interest me enough to complete. turned out to be more mindless than mindful! But it'd be a good place to start again.

Yes I do see bub when we skype - usually adult child puts the camera where I am looking at one or another of the children. And you're right bub is changing rapidly. When I was there they were a frail little infant, now they are robust and chubby.

Today was forecast to be 36+ here but so far it's cool and cloudy - hoping the weather man was wrong.

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