FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Our stories

A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

14,191 - 14,200 of 27,230

In response to: A long rave

Re: A Long Rave

you sound so busy @Mazarita but a good busy too. im sure your movie will be a amazing once its completed! how i wish i could see it so i could support you in real life too but i know i cant and definently wont push that either.

i have done some crochetting today and becasue of rain and drs orders to be resting ill get some more done. ive had to put my rainbow blanket on hold just until i get my aunts baby blanket done so im trying to do as much as possible.

could you uplaod a pic of your completed knitting project?

In response to: A long rave

Re: A Long Rave

evening @Faith-and-Hope
how are you going tonight?

In response to: Re: A Long Rave

Re: A Long Rave

Congratulations @eth .... 🎈💐💟✨

@Mazarita .... continuing study next year, all being well, and D3 along with me in the same course .... assuming she is accepted.

Love and hugs to all ...... 🖐💕

@CheerBear @Teej @Zoe7 @outlander @Shaz51 @Sophia1 @Maggie @Sans911 @Snowie @Bunniekins @Exoplanet @Appleblossom @saturnzoon .... anyone else around ......

In response to: Re: A Long Rave

Re: A Long Rave

Tired tonight @outlander .... combination of reasons, but I haven't been getting enough sleep ..... some of it to do with my mr. not sleeping well and getting up and down during the nights.

I will be staying backgroun-ish tonight as I complete some uni assignments.

Thanks for asking ..... 😊

Just checking out other people's news by degrees.

Hugs .......

In response to: Re: A Long Rave

Re: A Long Rave

oh your most welcome to join us on the rough time thread too @Faith-and-Hope we are having mint biscuits and hot chocolate. 🙂

poor bugger, not sleeping can be horrible. i hope you can get some sleep tonight. hugs for you too

In response to: Re: A Long Rave

Re: A Long Rave

Thanks Hon .... you too.

@outlander

In response to: Re: A Long Rave

Re: A Long Rave

Good evening @Faith-and-Hope @Mazarita @outlander @Shaz51 @CheerBear

@Teej @Zoe7 @Bunniekins @Exoplanet @Appleblossom @Former-Member @Adge @BlueBay

Congratulations GrandmaCongratulations on your Grandchild @eth

Congratulations @CheerBear for the suicide team

In response to: Re: A Long Rave

Re: A Long Rave

Good morning everyone 🙂 Hope there was some decent sleep happening for all last night.

Thanks for your encouraging feel good message last night @Mazarita 😊 Hugs for the exciting but very busy sounding time you're going through at the moment. Imagining how tricky it might be to need to wait for the soundtrack before you can get in to your part of the video. I hope it arrives on time and with enough time for you to be able to work on it without the extra stress of a shorter deadline. Yay for the knitting being finished! Will you go and see the display when it's up? Ugh for the house inspection. I'm expecting notice of ours to arrive any day now. I was thinking it may fall over the school holidays and am breathing big relief that it didn't!

@Exoplanet I really enjoyed reading of your adventures. Trying to imagine where you live to see all you that do feels like fireworks in my head! It sounds like nowhere I've lived (or can really even imagine living) before. Near 50 degree temps sounds awful though.

Hope you enjoy your visit today with step D1 @Shaz51 ❤

Great to hear you've been crocheting @outlander. Did you pick up a yarn cake?

Hi and thanks @saturnzoon 🙂 How have the last couple of days been for you and your sons? Not sure where you are and whether it's first or second week of school holidays. It's second week here - we made it!

@eth on my visit into the hospital I got to see a huge amount of tiny, squeaky, squishy, bundled up newbies. I get way too clucky around them! I thought of you and your new addition lots while I was ooohing and ahhing.

Hi also @Bunniekins, @Sophia1, @Faith-and-Hope, @Teej, @Appleblossom and all (this can be a busy little corner of the forum sometimes!)

The sun is shining bright here this morning and the birds are all out bouncing around the trees. My visit to the hospital yesterday wasn't very nice at all and my afternoon was emotionally draining but today is a new day. I'm hoping to spend it with my littles doing something nice with just us today. Not quite sure what yet but we'll figure something out 🙂

Hope there is plenty of good in today for all ❤

In response to: Re: A Long Rave

Re: A Long Rave

Morning @CheerBear and everyone (sorry brains not quite in gear yet!)

I did indeed buy a yarn cake. This ones shades of blue and green with some white. Ill take a pic later. I think thr name of it is 'faerie' I feel abit more motivated now too, i think it mightve been the dread with colouring changes so will make up a few smaller swatches and practice on those till i get better at it.
Im thinking a white border might look nice with these colours as it goes from light to dark back to light in their different shades
I went to spotlight yesterday, i reeeallly wanted to just pick up the yarn section and implant it in my backyard lol.

Are you working on anything? A day with LF sounds like a good plan 🌈

In response to: Re: A Long Rave

Re: A Long Rave

OMG! It's raining!! 😄
It was overcast yesterday, the sky had {& still does} that strange orange tinge to it.
There was a big dust storm further inland. Actually I think I noticed the ground
was wet when I got up! 🙂 It's not a heavy rain by any means, & I think it might actually be finished already {awwwwww} - but those raindrops were wet 🙂 {Lucky I brought the washing in yesterday :)}

Mazy @Mazarita your schedule feels like an adventure to me, I know I couldn't do it . . . but I don't have to, I can borrow excitement from your words 🙂

@CheerBearI feel there is an underlying tragedy playing out in the background of your life, but despite that you are striving to help others Hell, just being a Mum is hard enough work! Your a Super-Woman!

@TeejI love the dog pic! I wonder whether your dream was your brain trying to create a personal reality that your bout of depression is leaving?

@ethI can't image the anticipation your feeling, of greeting your newest family member & of giving your beloved child supportive congratulations Thank you for sharing some of that euphoria with all of us

@AppleblossomLions! WOW!!!!

A shout-out Hello to @Shaz51 @Faith-and-Hope @Bunniekins @outlander @saturnzoon

I went to go for slightly different walk number 6 yesterday, there's only 1 track that has a little bitumen at the beginning of it, {there was an area of that forest that was used as a quarry once} seeing as it was overcast I headed to that one. I'd already been there this week, but the plan was to walk a different track. I needed the bitumen to park on {it's just off the bitumen highway also - so up until walking distance back to home, it's weather proof}, because if it rains chances are I'd be stuck for at least 24 hours. But the Staffy had different ideas. From where I parked the track I intended to go to wasn't far, but in less than a minute the Staffy was already waaaaaay off in the distance {it happens the moment I open the back of the ute :)} I stood at the beginning of the track I wanted to walk & started calling him, I didn't want to turn off the main track without him knowing what direction I was going. I have no intentions of giving up smoking, it takes all I have not to drink, but I try to stick to 1 an hour; it was on the hour so I lit a smoke & continued calling & whistling. I smoked the smoke whilst calling & whistling & then finished the smoke & continued calling & whistling. I saw him a few times, waaaaaay off in the distance on the main track; perhaps he couldn't see or hear me, but that's not what I really think. I think he caught sight or waft of the sent of a roo or pig . . . & he just didn't want to come back! I can have a fairly determined streak at times, so I started looking for a convenient log to sit on & wait for him to return. I tried one but it wasn't comfortable & truth is I was getting worried, because he hadn't done this for so long. I went to go back to the car, but I couldn't do it, so I turned back around & started up the main track, calling & whistling. I was cranky! As I walked, calling & whistling, that crankiness started to transform, I wasn't even getting glimpses of him now - he was just gone! This wasn't normal. I sort of become super-calm & everything feels like it slows down; like the neurons on the pathway that carry the super-stress emotions have burnt-out over my lifetime & there's a void instead. But thoughts were racing in the back of my head, 'he always comes back' 'my biggest fear is that one day he'll take off in the bush & won't return - is today that day?'. My voice was starting to crack & my mouth & throat was very dry, I'd been calling & whistling from quite some time. I reached the spot that I thought I'd seen him last & I just sort of stopped, I wasn't sure what to do next, I was thinking of going back & getting the car; like I said any rain & that could be disastrous, even dry I'm not sure my car would make it up that track. Then he appeared, like a dot in the distance, but a dot that was travelling in my direction 🙂 I don't get cranky at him when he has these adventures, I never did, in fact I Woo Hoo'd him & gave him a treat - I hope that sort of reception make him always want to come back to me. But I did, immediately, put him on-lead; returned to the car & went home 🙂 It had only been 1 & a 1/2 hours since we left, but considering he took off as soon as we got there, that was 1 & a 1/2 hours of calling & whistling! No wonder my throats a bit croaky 😉 We often walk for that long or longer, so when we returned home I decided we'd have a bathing afternoon - which means today I have a gossamer silky-soft little white velvet dog, a sparkly, shiny, glowing ball of muscle & even I don't smell to bad 😄

14,191 - 14,200 of 27,230