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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

That sounds really lovely @eth. I hope you enjoy it if you go.

The other day someone told me about the Alice Springs Beanie Festival which I hadn't heard of before. I don't know why but you popped into my mind when I was looking through some of the awesome photos and reading about it. It's very cool 🙂

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I haven't been to the beanie festival @CheerBear but I did go to Alice Springs about 15 years ago for an archery competition that I and my child competed in. I broke my bow and it hit me in the head so I had to sit it out but my then teenage child came home with a medal. Pretty amazing considering they are legally blind!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Wow @eth - that is seriously impressive! It sounds like you and child have been on lots of adventures of different kinds over the years. It's something that I wish I could have done more of (do more of) but something I've always found difficult.

Your child sounds strong. I'm thinking that may have been passed down from pretty strong mum.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Mazy
Deep down in a tunneling hole
there is no warmth, it is so cold
it's dark, no light, no means for sight
no wish for death, no room for breath
a mind that's shut down deep & longs more morbid sleep
The fact there's fear, is good & clear
a strand of strength holds true
the sand, the sea, creativity is standing up for you
memories bad, feelings sad, thoughts of years past
everything changes, nothing stays the same
that tunnel can not last

I love you @Mazarita

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Sophia1
I think I'm exactly like you . . . desperately wanting to do something {camping} always
finding a reason I can't. I kind of did set a date, the day baiting started . . . 3 days
ago now 😉 - but I had to go to a Doctors appointment {I really had to do that}, then I
had to go to the 'big smoke', then google said it was going to rain . . . it was windy &
we did get a few drops last night 🙂 I have a spot chosen, but I didn't get around to
packing the car yesterday, I did clip some more netting up {just 1 section to go!} &
took the dogs for a off-lead walk at the local offical dog area + I have written a
camping list {I'm good at writing lists :)} & it is still on my mind to pack the car 🙂
Please jump 'in it' as often as you like 🙂 Only keep out of it if it helps 🙂 I think
I have an idea what it feels like when your head is fragmented & if it's like what I'm
thinking, it really isn't very pleasant ❤️ Sending you lots of love ❤️ ❤️

@eth
I played a lot of cards with my Grandmother, even my Mum {though not as much}, but I've
never played Bridge. It was always for fun, though when my Grandmother played poker, we'd
bet with match sticks or her collection of 1 cent pieces 🙂 My Mother was particulary
good at a game called Canasta, 2 decks of cards & I swear she could remember which cards
had been played & which ones hadn't. I never even attempted to remember the plays, I just
had fun. The game itself would have been totally boring if it wasn't for the conversation
& laughter that went on during play 🙂 ❤️ I wish I knew someone with a propety I could
go camping on, do you get to look over water . . . 'cause that would make it perfect 🙂

@outlander
Your life seems like a bit of a battle field! . . . from which you are always recovering,
battered & bruised ❤️ I think the boots are a good idea, & if people {I'm guessing your
family} are going to think your crazy for doing so, . . . then I think you should compliment
those boots with a bright pink tu-tu 😄 Maybe then they might overcome their difficulties
in recognizing the difficulties you face on a day to day basis!

Love to all

@CheerBear @Teej @Bunniekins @everyone

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Exoplanet a battlefield indeed...
Hmm im sure i could find a bright pink tutu somewhere.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I love your prose @Exoplanet it's beautiful.

I don't see water from where I camp but I can hear one of the 2 rivers that meet on the property. Last time I saw a flock of king parrots - the blue and red ones - that was kinda special. I love hearing the early morning kookaburras, they always put a smile on my face.

@CheerBear you seem plenty brave to me. It would be a lot harder to adventure with more children - I only had the one. And truth be told, a lot of our adventures were during periods of my mania and included risk taking behaviours that I wouldn't let myself do these days. But I do have some stories to tell. I have to be careful what I say about the past when with my now adult child - they have PTSD from childhood traumas as a result of my poor choices of relationships and company I kept. I didn't know I was mentally unwell for many years and would fly off on a whim very often when having what I now know to be bipolar episodes. I still hear details I didn't remember from family members. Which often gives me guilt and shame for what I exposed my kid to. But in the mix of it all there were some very special adventures that had positive outcomes like the archery experiences.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning, everyone.

@Exoplanet, thank you for the wonderful poem.

@eth, thank you for the wonderful image and words.

@CheerBear, thank you for the beautiful jonquils and thoughts.

Rose from another long sleep and strange dreams to a big sound of machinery in the stairwell. Had a peek around the front door and there's a big black tube running from one of the upstairs flats down out the front door. Don't know what it is but it's making a huge racket. It almost makes me laugh to wake up to such a loud and mysterious noise. Bit of black comedy on morning waking.

Other than that, I'm okay so far today but don't know how long I'll be able to stay awake.

C is around all weekend, though he's out at the market just now. He knows what is happening with me and is looking after me.

Hopefully I'll have some energy soon to respond properly to everyone here. For now, another thank you for the kindness and love sent my way. Sending love straight back to you.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

It's great to see you @Mazarita. Sounds like maybe someone upstairs is having their carpet steam cleaned or something. A mystery and not nice to wake up to I imagine. I'm glad to hear C is looking after you. He's a saving grace.

I'm glad you are feeling the love flowing to you from so many of us here. We care!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita

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