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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Mazarita I'm back if you're still around. Enjoying the lifting of anxiety this afternoon.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth@Mazarita I am back to for about 30 mins and then going away again and then coming back again :P. How is the vapour thingy going?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Bunniekins I've had my vape about 2 weeks now. It's a sort of coconut and spice flavour. Using it a few times a day - still on the ciggies but going longer between them sometimes. Not pressuring myself but aiming to cut ciggies right down before too long. I'm so fully hooked on nicotine and my vape has none in it. I can't use patches, gum, champix etc because they make me manic.

Hope you like yours @Mazarita.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth I really hope you can wean yourself totally off nicotine. I gave up ciggies back in the 80s I was smoking St. Moritz (remember those). They got too expensive and I could feel myself getting sick so I just stopped one day .... I couldn't do it gradually with patches etc. It had to be all or nothing. That is the pea all or nothing.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good on you @Bunniekins I admire your strength in many ways.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth Thanks eth 🙂 I admire your strength too the way you have fought for the NDIS package that was an enormous battle and you came out on top. Kudos to you eth :)xxxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

heading off for awhile bbs cannot wait to hear about your new vap @Mazarita

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks back atcha @Bunniekins

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I called a mutual friend and she thought it was great that my son and I go tonight. The American Lady apparently does not know whether she is Arthur or Martha, but rich son bought her unit in trendy place. SO she is going. The other friend knew how much effort I put into being the lady's friend. It is what it is. It is not my son's or my responsibility to manage her decline and she was a handfull and high maintenance. So I think tonight should be good for my boy too. End of a chapter.

Another tricky relationship might be turning a corner as the Recorder lady as been approaching me at choir each break. Being nice, but pedantic as usual. She has not spoken about my e mail about her putting out my neck, last month but she is being friendly, and with so many bossy boots all over the bloomin place. I notice friendly interactions. We will see. People are work. How much .... depends ..

Take Care ALL

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning @Mazarita @Appleblossom @Bunniekins @Exoplanet @CheerBear @outlander @Sophia1 @The-red-centaur @Faith-and-Hope and anyone else passing by here today.

A very quiet morning here. Hoping everyone has had a good sleep and is starting the day peacefully.

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