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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I’d have to let them know in the morning @CheerBear

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Oh @Teej. Getting out of your head and your rut sounds so good. Would the other things you have planned do the same thing do you think?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@CheerBear

One of the things I have planned can be very tricky and can get me more in my head. It’s a little more complex than that. I kind of owe something (sorry talking in tongues a bit) . I also have my ongoing assessment with new psychologist. Would have gone with friend from tues arvo to thurs lunchtime and still been able to schedule psych in too.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I get it is complex (without getting getting it exactly) @Teej. As far as your psych assessment - what would your psych think was good to do? Do you have a gut feeling about what to do

So many questions sorry.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Questions are better than burying my head in the sand @CheerBear which is my usual position. :face_with_rolling_eyes:

i dont know about psych. I guess I could ring and see. I have to have about 4 sessions first to see if I’m compatible with the therapy they are offering and if we can work together. It’s messing with my head and I know I would be so much better if I knew what was happening with that.

I know now it’s messing with my brain lots. By the time I was driving to my friend today I was composing an angry suicide note to my kids as to why they should accept my choice. I suddenly realised and freaked out and went WTF in my head. I struggled to be with her because I wanted to yell at her that I didn’t want to be here but I kept composed and got through ok. Then came home and collapsed. I’m fine now. It’s passed but it just shows how quickly I fly off.

Long story long long I don’t know if the timing is good. My head is still filled with huge anxiety over new psych and therapy.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I can totally understand why it's such a stressful time @Teej, with all these changes and all that uncertainty. I also get the flying off really quickly thing. Zero to a million in a flash is one of my hardest battles.

You did really well today to pick up on the struggle, to get through it and to find your way to more safe space (head space maybe). Truly. It's a huge and exhausting fight.

I don't know what you should do and I know you're not asking me either, but I do want to remind you (gently) that there's probably a reason you've been waiting for this and my guess is that it's because you believe it might help. I don't know if it's possible for you to call a stop on everything else as much as you can, and take some time out and away from all the stuff that goes on, but if there's any chance you can and it might help, it could be worth it.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @CheerBear. I think you just helped me realise that the messy talking in tongues thing is really unhelpful just now and this has potential to be really helpful. I know that they won’t get it but they don’t have too (the messy thing people). Oh the language we create here 😆

Ill ring cmh tomorrow to see what they say. I have psych app on Wednesday. I’m hoping I’ll get a better feel by then.

Thank you so much. I’ll let you go and unwind and hopefully have lovely dreams 💓😜😘

cheers 💜🤗

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Dear @CheerBear @Mazarita @Teej @Faith-and-Hope @Teej

We all have our special friends. @Appleblossom is someone who well I really feel good when I see her around......

@Mazarita well, that @Mazarita in a cheeky way.....she and me just mosied along......then she gave me a present of a beautiful video....how unexpected......just when I was going through something shakey..........thank you but can't find it :0)

I feel this with everyone here: I only chose the two here because known them the longest.....but I always have in my head, our click into friendship.

@Mazarita I like what @Faith-and-Hope writes .... I'de not answer the phone at 5am.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Big huge 💗 @Teej I know you'll make the right choice for you even though it's really hard right now. No-one but you really needs to get it (even though it would be so much easier if everyone got it all the time!). Will be thinking of you as always, interested in hearing how you get on.

I have a really big craving for KFC bun and mayo and lettuce - what the heck! I think that may be a med talking which means I may be out like a light in about 3 seconds from now. So nice to catch up with you tonight.

Waving hi and bye for now @PeppiPatty. Hope you're well ☺

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Awww @CheerBear

You an me on KFC bun ok ?

@Kurra @Shaz51 @Appleblossom @Faith-and-Hope @Mazarita @CheerBear @Teej

I got the GP to sign these forms for my University Lecturer that I suffer mental health issues and I'm full-time carer for a man who is my husband and suffers Chronic Paranoid Schizophrenia and I can get extra time to do assignments and just get a bit of stress taken off because of my situation. It didn't click when it was happening but I called her this morning and she said, now PeppiPatty, we all have problems and we need to just get on with it don't we?

I laughed and agreed not realizing qhat she was saying:

but now I feel annoyed.......grrr.......what to do?

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