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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Responding directly to you @Exoplanet

knowing that the pain does not subside so easily....

as Mazarita mentioned your cat had an amazing personality and traits....

all allowed to blossom as a result of you and your family loving him so deeply...

Would it help if you framed his photograph placing it near a space or in a room he shared his time with you?...

or perhaps that might be too painful for you....we all deal with our grief and memories in different ways...none right or wrong as you already know...

I was going to write about this spiritual moment that I had after responding to your initial post about the loss of your beautiful feline friend....

Then I paused and thought about how you might not want to know about that at this time...

I do this all of the time now....write responses...then edit them....

I shall leave it up to you...

Putting the fence episode to bed so to speak is a strong move....

you are very self aware @Exoplanet

lovely that you are tagging me ...a beautiful way of showing your gratitude and thanking me...

keep on writing and tagging me if you choose..

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita yes I woke up a cold, soggy pea 😞 so I got up stripped off filled up the bottle again found out where the leak was and balanced the wretched thing on my body and it worked!!!!! Got some hours of sleep in whilst sleeping like a pretzel around the wet spot lol.

How is your day going and my fav is 52 girls but they have so many great songs it is hard to choose 😄

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi everyone @Mazarita@Bunniekins@Sophia1@Exoplanet@outlander@Shaz51 and anyone else around. I'll be here for about 1/2 hour before going out to a cafe and Bunnings with mum and bro. Had a really peaceful time with Mum this morning listening to music and looking at photos. She loved Fat Freddys Drop! So I've introduced her to dub music - I was surprised she liked it so much.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth Your mum sounds a hoot! What are you buying from Bunnings? I went there yesterday and bought to plants. I love Bunnings the staff there are always so cheerful (I know they have to be but still) 🙂

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Bunniekins Bro wants to get a step for the back verandah next door for when sil's mother moves in. Mum and I are along for the ride and will def look in the garden area.

How's your day been?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth I have had a lovely day. Weather here has been great. S2 will be home in 30 mins have his afternoon snack ready just the way he likes it. Everything is perfect. I can just see you and your mother pottering around the garden section.:)

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

hello and hugs @Bunniekins, @Mazarita, @eth, @Sophia1, @Exoplanet

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Jusst what I needed was hugs 😄 thanks Shaz51 @Shaz51 . Hugs for you too! xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Bunniekins, soggy bed is no fun. I'm still amazed you balanced the leaky hot water bottle, while pretzelling around the wet patch! Today went pretty well for me. Finished all my washing (9 loads in all, including yesterday's round). Remember how I was talking about wanting to do my washing last week and the week before, and probably also the week before that and the week before that? Well, it's finally done.

Hi @eth, so good to hear you had some peaceful time with your mum. Surprising that she likes dub music! I'm guessing it was family photos you were sharing. Sounds like a special moment between the two of you. Hope the rest of the day went as well.

Hi @Shaz51, hugs to you too. Wonder how the day has gone for you, hoping your blood sugar is looking okay.

Hi @outlander, @Sophia1, @Exoplanet, @CheerBear, @Maggie and everyone, hope the evening is going okay or better for you.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita 💗
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