Parenting + Depression

my mental health is one reason i would have to seriously consider if i have kids or not. not because i would actively hurt them but i do wonder if I would be able to be a consistent parent and i wouldnt want to make the kids life more difficult than it had to be. either way if i was to have kids i would want to make sure i had set up and reliable support system that could help when needed to make sure the kids were fine. so for me i think mental health doesnt mean you arent a good parent but i think it means sometimes you need a little extra support. but i mean really what parent doesnt need extra help.

@Eden1919 @Former-Member I have extreme guilt over my parenting when I was out of control mentally ill roughly about 8 years ago now. I am working through it with my pdoc. All my kids have said (when I asked them about how they felt when I was so sick) that it was not my fault. That I was mentally ill. They are the only reason why I remain on medication. Because I have promised them that mum will never get ill like that again at least I will do my best never to get il again. I cannot do more than than that.

I would like to add that part of being a human is to make mistakes. No one is perfect, we all make mistakes for whatever reasons. The trick is not to make the same mistakes twice and I endeavour to never put my family or myself through that kind of pain.... that hell .... again no matter what. greenpea

exactly @Eden1919 it really does 'it takes a village to raise a child." properly. Community s mire than Imeetings and keeping with the J.... I was very much alone raising both my kids, it's not Good to be alone...I think to my mistake was moving to ova small town - no resources.

@greenpea, @ you're lucky your kids understand. My son fights frantically to "beat his genetics" - actually thinks he can alter his DNA... And he's chipped me for bringing a child into the world n such "unfavourable circumstances" (a brilliant psychologist told him that), Soni explained how I contemplated abortion but wanted you too much... Which he interpreted as "you wanted to abort me!" Good grief! This week we're not talking because he called me 'dmanding' for questioning why he's not answered my last few tx... I iwsh your kids would have a talk with him. Then again, I'm exhausting when I'm not well he says so he has to distance... And hey, I don't want to hold him back. He's 29now and doing ok

I'm so proud of you for staying on medication for your family. Took me a long time to find the right one but I only took meds so I wouldn't yell at the Kidz as much.

Parenting is soooo hard ❣️

Hi @Former-Member

I think as parents who care, we always worry that we are doing the right thing. I have not only had a mental illness but a physical disablilty too. Yes my kids have grown up a little faster. But then my kids know how to do their washing. How to cook basic meals. They understand what mental illness is and that it is real. I worried about what I was doing to my kids when they were younger, but now I see them as very strong young adults and they know a lot more about real life then some of their peers. Guilt and worry is normal. Talk to your kids and see what they think. Even if they are little, they will have an opinion.