likeabirdCasual Contributor
eating disorder/food and body issues
For 7 years now I have been struggling with eating disorder thoughts. It has changed forms over the years and my shape has changed to each end, yet my mind remains similar. I feel like my thoughts just go around in circles all day. Constantly thinking about food, what I should eat, how to not eat so much, how to change my body, how to get some discipline, how to not think about food or my body. I have learned to live with it, but it has come to my attention recently that this may not be normal, and I am considering getting some more support. It is just a little frustrating as I have tried that in the past and yet still struggle. I guess it takes time.
I find that I isolate myself from other people and avoid any social events and even have been avoiding work. I feel embarrassed to be seen. I feel that I don't belong in this body. I feel like I need to lose weight in order to be comfortable enough to live. But I also know from experience that even when I lose weight I still feel the same way as I did. It's frustrating to look back on and I wish I could go back and shake myself so I could realise that I was healthy and looked good at the time.
So, I guess where I'm at is just trying to feel comfortable around food, around people, and in my own skin.
If you have any advice, I am all ears.
Thank you in advance 🙂
