Ask Us Anything // Blue Knot Helpline // Monday 27 May – Friday 31 May

Ok thanks @Former-Member

sorry for putting too much stuff on here

Hi @BlueKnot I told no-one of my childhood sexual abuse, for over 30 years.

I did not feel safe or supported enought to disclose, even to my parents.

It was a cousin (relative) of the same gender (male), who was the perpetrator - which somehow made it seem more shameful, & harder to disclose.

I have complex PTSD, not only due to that SA - my home environment was highly traumatic (for 20 years).

I told my Mum a few years ago. Her reaction was entirely self-centred, reactive & blaming (of me). Which effectively shut-down all mention of the abuse to her (& to my siblings).

I should make use of your helpline, in future. I wasn't aware of it.

I’m sorry @Adge you had to go through this. I too didn’t tell my parents for a while and when I did I was yelled at and rejected. She still to this day will not tslk about my abuse. Needing validation, empathy support and love is so important to me but unfortunately I’ll probably never get it.

Hugs to you xx

Hi @Adge - it is great to see you come through here and find out about this service it is really helpful. What you have shared is such a tough situation and no doubt carries a lot of ongoing challenges and emotions - giving the helpline a go might be a good option to gain extra support.

Hi all!

We have had a question submitted via our anonymous form for @BlueKnot :

What are some of the common impacts of childhood trauma?

@BlueKnotWill have a comprehensive answer to that question.

Some of the impacts of childhood trauma are:

1) A sense of shame, from something that was not your doing (not your fault).

2) Loss of a sense of safety - feeling in danger, when not actually in danger.

3) Loss of healthy attachment relationships, especially with parents (if they were involved).

4) Difficulty in forming healthy relationships (attachments) with others.

5) Lack of Trust, & difficulty in trusting others (because they have hurt us in the past).

Adge

Hello and thank you for bringing the question @Former-Member

Extensive research has shown that people who have experienced complex trauma, particularly in childhood often have emotional AND physical health problems in adulthood. Many also struggle with their self-esteem and sense of well-being. It can affect survivors’ chances of forming strong social and intimate relationships, including parenting. Research also indicates the detrimental impacts on education and employment with survivors who have complex trauma as well as alcohol and other drug use to manage the impacts. Just as we now understand more about complex trauma and its impacts we also know a lot more about resilience and healing.

Neuroplasticity shows us that the structure and function of the brain can change throughout life. We know that people can and do recover from even severe early life trauma and do go on to form strong relationships with others. Research shows that we have every reason to be optimistic about recovery from trauma and the importance of honouring survival, survivors’ strength and courage, holding a sense of hope and optimism. Each person has their own journey towards healing.

Hi everyone!

Last day of this event - be sure to pop in any questions that you might like to ask @BlueKnot. We have another one from an anonymous submission today:

Is it possible to heal from complex trauma? How long does it take usually?

Hi @Former-Member excellent question,

People can and do recover from childhood trauma. In fact it is possible for people who have experienced childhood trauma to live a full and constructive life. Many come to thrive and enjoy a feeling of wholeness, satisfaction in life and work, and genuine love and trust in relationships. Relationships are very important for recovery. Positive relational experiences greatly assist trauma recovery and also promote general well-being.

Understanding the connection between prior trauma and current behaviour is an important step towards healing. While trauma can have lots of impacts, people do develop the skills necessary to survive. At times people can feel as though they are barely surviving. That they’re barely functioning or not functioning at all. It is important to acknowledge that ‘good enough’ functioning is an achievement in itself. This is in the context of what was experienced by that child.

Different people are at different points in their journey. Some may find daily life a particular struggle. Others are connecting the dots between their abuse and trauma and their current life. Still others have found a way to live fully in the present.

Many survivors display a great deal of strength. They find ingenious ways to get their needs met. This can include developing creative ways to express themselves. Many decide to never hurt as they have been hurt.

Advances in neuroscience tell us about the plasticity of the brain i.e. the capacity of the brain to repair and heal. This can occur right through life and provides a scientific basis for hope and optimism around recovery.

Survivors often show a great deal of resilience on their recovery journey. Resilience means the capacity to sustain and respond to life stress, setback and difficulty. Many survivors process their trauma and come to terms with it. They ‘work through’ their traumatic experience so that it is no longer overwhelming. Research shows that it is possible for trauma to be resolved and for people to heal. This includes minimising its negative effects on the next generation.

In fact it is possible to develop beyond recovery. Post traumatic growth is the positive change experienced as a result of a person’s journey through trauma. The capacity to survive and negotiate the challenges of significant adversity can promote inner strength and growth. This process can transform a person’s reactions, world view and response to adversity. When a person experiences post-traumatic growth, they come to appreciate their life more fully, build on their inner strengths and acknowledge them, forge deeper relationships and plan more for a fulfilled future . I have copied the link to “ Towards Recovery “ a Blue Knot fact sheet for survivors to provide some additional information.

https://www.blueknot.org.au/Portals/2/Publications/Fact%20Sheet_Survivors_UWEB.pdf?ver=2018-08-29-135142-913

What an excellent week full of meaningful, brave and heartfelt questions and information. Thank you so much to everyone that came along and shared their experience and questions 💙

A big huge thank you to our friends at @BlueKnot for providing us with so much information and highlighting their service.

Feel free to visit the Blue Knot Foundation website to find anymore information and/or to connect to the helpline.