Self Harm ~ No More

@Former-Member, you okay?

Hi @Former-Member

Can you give your GP a call and go for a check up ?

You need someone to help you with that pain you're feeling.

Hi @Former-Member 🙂

Its good to hear from you.

You have so much going on, it must be hard to keep it all steady. I have a lot going on too, but it's a different combo of issues. I have better days than others. It's probably like that for all of us on the forums, but then, that's why we're here. Just walking through it all together ....

🌷

I can see you have taken on some strategies, and that's important, along with goals, like keeping everything settled in the lead-up to your son completing his uni course. I'm sure that is helping you too. I am leaning on strategies and short-term goals. It is an effective way to work through each day.

I am sorry the Lifeline chat didn't go so well. There will be different staff on tho, so worth trying again any time you are struggling with those sort of thoughts. I don't know if it helps to stay distracted. Maybe you can create a bit of a "menu" of things to do to try to shut down negative thought patterns, by over-riding them with other activities. I guess it's a bit like wearing a different hat for visitors if you don't want them to see your struggles. If you think of the activities on your list as different hats, it might help you to "change hats" when you are feeling really down.

Think of doing it for your son. Pick something you can do for him, or something you can tell him about, Iike news.

Some of the things on my "hat menu" are:

Cooking - cook extra and freeze some

Going for a walk

Listening to musicSeeing

Seeing to beds, dishes and laundry - getting the basics done

Walking through the house straightening things up a bit as if you were about to have visitors

Sweeping the floors - it's simple but it makes a big difference

Visiting the library, art gallery, a special park

Visiting someone

Do you have any hobbies ? Jigsaw puzzles, crosswords, handcrafts ?

Jump in a train or bus to go somewhere a few stops away that you haven't been to, and have a cup of tea in a cafe, sit there people-watching, and then come home again.

I hope some of these are helpful.

Take care. Sleep well tonight 💤

Good morning @Former-Member 🌻

I am completely genuine in my use of language, I assure you. A lot of the terms I use come from my mother, and my dad's mum, who were both teachers. I think the terms are good ones and purposeful, which is why they are probably a little more commonly used than you realise. I am glad we share those terms, speak a similar language. It helps to feel a little more at ease with people, I find.

To me, living is in all the little every day things, and you know something ? I am hearing that advice repeated again and again to people whose lives are falling apart under the effects of "affluenza". So many people are trying so hard to be everything they think society wants them to be, they have forgotten to just be themselves in their daily lives, just going about the business of the day, breathing well, and being happy and content about whatever they can.

They forget to take the baby steps, and find that sense of peace and achievement in just living the small stuff. We have a society pressure that says you have to be this or that, you need more of this or that, you have to look like this or that .... and people are getting overwhelmed trying to live up to unrealistic expectations.

My life is so full of commitments because I have a large family, with 'extras', like a special-needs child, a nod Te ins born close to my first child, and a family business of the type that takes over your life and applies an enormous amount of pressure, and now a husband ill but unaware that he is ...

I talk to my Dad sometimes. He grew up as one of six kids, but my life makes his head spin ! I have way more stuff going on than most people I know around me. I think your schedule is actually way more normal, once the business that comes with raising kids passes. And that will happen for me too. It's just that the more kids you have, the more crap comes along with that, and you think the hard part is when they are small !

We are all doing well in our own circumstances @Former-Member. That includes you. Just keep taking those daily steps, praying, and drawing love to your life, as you are through the forums here. Little by little yet he chaos will subside and things will get better.

I am enjoying your company. Thanks for being there for me 🌻

Sorry ... gotta love that Spellcheck ....

** twins born close to my first child

** little by little the chaos will subside