Checking In

Hi @MDT , how r things doing with u my friend?

Hi @Doglover @MDT @outlander @Shaz51 @BlueBay @Gazza75

No decision has been made yet. I have spoken to my GP every day this week and I have seen her twice this week. In terms of seeing a psychologist I don't think I can afford to see one. I have other commitments first. I am lucky my GP bulk bills and my specialists do too. I did have out of pocket expenses for my major surgery but it was very reasonable. I have paid to see one specialist more regular in recent years but not sure if I will continue with her. I have mainly seen her to access the day program but I have not done that but I have seen her privately not sure if I can afford to continue to do this. I think I will stick to my bulk billing Drs . The hospital would like me to see a therapist weekly or every second week. That is their recommendations but I can't afford it- it is quite simple. How do I talk to them about it?

I am still struggling with my feelings and feeling like I am a nobody- to be honest I have not felt this down in a longtime. Thank you for listening and sorry for being so negative. I am not sure what is getting me down. I did have a big trigger a few weeks back with family. I don't feel comfortable with my brother and his family- for the most part anyway. I think most people see me as a push over. I have had hurtful things said to me and I did bring this up with a friend- because she has said hurtful things to me. I asked her about it today and she said she would never say that etc. And that just really confused me because that is not my reality. My friend asked me if my bank details were the same and I said yes. She deposited money into my account because she owes me money. I am not sure what that is about- I know she owes me money but I was not expecting it today. Do you think I am being too soft? I am actually feeling gulity about her depositing the money?

I am just trying the best I can atm. I have Milo with me atm- he is cuddled up with me. I think I will have something to eat soon and take my medication and try for some sleep. I am nervous about tomorrow- I have a meetup with a group- we're a travel group and we meet for lunch once a month . I am bit nervous because of my sleeve and eating with them tomorrow.

@MDT
@Gazza75

Sorry to hear that you have been struggling too- I think I read about you were thinking about going into hospital too- I am not sure if that is still the case or you're just seeing how you go. How are you and what are your thoughts on hospital?

I think family can be diffcult and sorry to hear your mum and sister are driving you up the wall. My brother really upset me a few weeks back. I made an effort to attend is grandsons first birthday and when I arrived he said hello sucker- not sure what he meant by that but it made me feel uncomfortable and I felt like just getting back in the car and going. I think that was on the Sunday and he was meant to come up for my birthday two days later but he was too busy- he had meetings to attend to even though I asked him weeks in advance. It hurts me- my brother works for himself and he could manage his time to be able to come up and see me and celebrate my birthday but no.

I think I am going to park things up tonight and focus on just taking care of myself for now. I have not had my med yet but will do that shortly. I had a dreadful night sleep last night. Hope tonight is better.

Hi Hams @MDT

I not really spoken to him about it- I just ignored it. But obviously felt hurt by the remark but just need to let it go. Next time I will say something to him.

I can relate to being sick of being unemployed too- I am on a medical pension atm. That would really get me down too.I have to start setting myself small goals too. I am volunteering atm and that gives me a bit of direction and structure.

I look at hospital similar to you- I think that is why I was thinking of hospital because I needed a bit of leeway too and distance from family. Another thing I like about hospital is that it gives me structure.It still maybe an option for me but atm. I am just trying to keep things low key.

I am hoping I sleep better too. Cheers Hams

Hey @oceangirl

I hear you and feel for you. I think at times a hospital stsy is good. It gives you a break from life.

I agree @MDT with you. Life can be tough at times and it’s nuce to have a small break.

One that I really need at the moment but can’t.

Take care both of you ❤️❤️

Hi my sister @BlueBay I wish we could go into hospital together. We would get along very well. Life is not easy that is for sure. I did go out to lunch today and I think that helped a little.

I agree about having a small break- I think that is what I need. The daily stressors, that may be contrbuiting to my depression at the moment. But depression is like any other illness and at times it does require treatment in hospital.

What have you been up to today BB?