Checking In

sorry for being a negative nancy re wheel alignment . Thats lucky getting 80% back @oceangirl yes it does get lonely, that usually manifests itself in thinking about the past etc. At least you go out, I dont. I dont even want to. anyway it is what it is. me, tv, stress, memories, work when I get myself there lol

All good Tab @TAB I understand what its like to be lonely. I basically have to do everything for myself. I don't have much support. But I am really independent too. What hobbies do you have? You should go out and try to meet people- it might help you a bit.

I undestand about thinking about the past too, that generally just upsets me. I stress a bit too. What worries you Tab?

I live in denial I guess re lonely @oceangirl a lot of the time I tell myself things are ok when have mini-goals and things going in the right direction

I dont really have hobbies or interests or seek people out except to talk to sometimes

I prefer to be on my own just not how I am doing it.

Worries ? I'm not a good friend or carer to myself. I make crap decisions on all levels, well, used to seem to work. also addiction is an issue. and geting old and health yee ha lol

ok I had gone to sleep and woke cos cold cos cant get organised enought to purchase warm bedding, just been trying to scrape through on stuff got away with 2 years ago. Same with clothes plus put on heaps of weight again this year so they dont quite fit lol which doesnt help with warmth haha then I took this job which new wasnt me now have prob spent as much time at home as have done there re being sick lol

I'm reaping rewards for not being able to make better decisions and choices and have been doing it for years. Things would make sense when had money, could just justify a trip and go see someone. Ran out of money and'someones' had to borrow money to go to my mothers funeral 2017

anyway you asked. I answered. got me in a mood, dreaming of regrets as waking

Hi there @oceangirl! I had a bad night last night but am determined not to make it a bad day. No sleep again!

Hi again @TAB sorry didn't mean to pry into your private affairs. i thought you might have wanted to talk. i'm a bit tired i have been up early this morning. i just hope your circumstances change for you my friend. i have to go out soon to the butchers to get meat for the weekend. i am worried about a friends son he is not in a good way, he is very depressed, my friend rang me and told me he had quite dark thoughts. everyone says go into hospital etc but I don't see that has the answer. i just hope he will be okay.

you need to start taking care of yourself tab. go out and buy yourself bedding and clothes- or buy what you can afford atm. i have always taken care of others but i think i want to do more for myself. i want to be happy. i like to do my own thing just like you because I don't want the drama in my life. not sure if that makes sense.

Hi @Queenie I am sorry you had a tough night my friend. I hope you get some comfort being in hospital. self care needs to be the key- rest if you need to. i am not sure what activities ground you but that might help with your sleep.

I just want to enjoy my life. I am going out with a friend tonight, I have know for about 25 years, she is like a second mum to me. Don't sweat the small stuff tab @TAB . Life is too short. Its never too late to start over and to do more. You can do it!!

yeah I know @oceangirl and did read/own the book once lol umm yeah lots of change would be good. Can only do what I can. and thanks

Hi all, just checking in.

I hope everyone is doing ok.

I am home from hospital but it did not help like I had hoped it would. My pdoc wants to send me back in there.