CherpieusSenior Contributor
Emotional Abuse
I haven't been on here for a while. Since then, my Mum has passed away and I changed medication. I've been going relatively well until Friday night.
My anxiety has come back in a big way, triggered by an outburst by my husband. I am now very scared of any interaction with him. I'm not in any physical danger. He hasn't physically abused me. He did however have what I will describe as a 'tantrum' in the middle of the night after I had gone to bed because he couldn't find the remote to turn the tv off. He smashed his keys/remote, banged cupboard doors, yelled and sweared, then started going off about everyone who lives in our house, including my two 16 year old teenagers (one of whom was standing there).
At the time I stood there shaking and afterwards I could not sleep and basically cried extremely quietly so as not to disturb him all night.
Yesterday I went out most of the day to avoid him. When I came home he asked if I had been crying and I told him I was earlier in the day. He asked why and I said I had had a hard night with him yelling. He said he couldn't find the remote and I couldn't respond. He didn't apologise - he doesn't really think there was anything wrong with it.
Anyway, whether it was wrong or not I have had severe anxious reactions I now can't control. I've completely lost my appetite and am having stomach problems, I'm crying continuously and I just want to go to bed. I went to bed at 7.30pm last night. I'm happy I'm at work today (Sunday) so I don't have to be around my husband. But I'm shaking and I can't get warm.
I'm so scared about going home. We are having a family dinner tonight with my Dad and I'm so anxious. I am not capable of talking to my husband about it any more as I am paralysed by fear. I know the feeling fear is now extreme but I don't know how to curb it?
Any advice or thoughts would be really helpful because I feel so alone.
Thanks,
Cherpieus