Self Help Books - what's you favorite?

i can't think of any that i really like. i sometimes read one to feel like i'm doing something but i find they ramp up my anxiety. after a week or so i detox what i've read and filter it back through my own philosophy and i'm usually better off.

these books usually have a mix of good stuff and commonsense mixed with disinformation and sometimes bad psychology. something about it irks me that there are no checks and balances as to what they can prescribe for people and the self help culture that promises to fix anything.

it doesnt really help that i'm wierd, i'm not wired up the same as most people, so chasing after experiences and relationships and some goals dont mean the same to me. i'd rather go and meditate on a mountaintop than be at the top of my field which some of these books see as the only way.

i guess i'm saying self development is a personal thing and i need to work it out on my own terms.

yeah this has turned into abit of a rant, sorry about that

Hi @Sahara, great idea for a thread. My favourite from recent times is In Praise of Slowness. It appeals to my need to slow down and enjoy life more. It's one of those books that I frequently lend out and people either really get it or just want to chuck it across the room. And then stamp on it. Not everyone is ready for the slow message 🙂

I think I might like that book @Former-Member.

When I was young I read to try and save myself. I was not critical enough. I thought everything was wonderful. I think @plasmo 's analogy of detoxing from a book is great .. made me laugh ... but it is so true. Thanks

Now I am critical of everything I read .. read a paragraph and toss it aside and just pick up Self Help Books very occasionally when I feel I want that type of mind programming.

I have read change your thinking before.. and probably need to read it again though... it all made sense when i read it but so hard to do! from memory it was a cbt based book.

I have also read hall's heal your life (was actually recommended to me by my GP).

truly wish there was a brain manual out there that solved all inner problems without fail though! probably my laziness shining through though hehe.

love the idea of this thread too, thanks!

lj

Great thread @Sahara

One book That I learned an immense amount from was Joseph A Bailey's 'The Serentity Principle". Which has a basis for people struggling with self medicating with alcohol. Its 30 years old or so now - but many prinicples in it that I still use today.

PS: I have always had an aversion to Lousie Hay (which I read and ascribed to 25 odd years ago) because I realised eventually that I felt that one is supposed to blame oneself and find the reason (the flaws in oneself) about why something is wrong with me. I don't need any encouragement to hate myself for not being "better" or a false belief that if I just 'do such and such" I will feel better. But that is just my opinion and I am glad you are finding it helpful.

I really like this thread @Sahara I have read a few books through the years. I too have read "You can Heal Your Life". In fact, it as the first self help book I read. I found it inspiring, but then, of course, life changed and I found myself with 2 children who were "Angels with Broken Wings". I became really depressed and so I dipped into quite a few books.

i have found that I seem to take a chunk out of all books , but not a whole lot out of all of them. Things from all sorts of books rise occasionally. My favourite book is "Learning How to Fall". I forget who wrote it but the poor man died of Motor Neurone Disease. Thing was, some of his words really touched me because I also have an auto immune disease and I was really struggling with it at the time, plus Paulo Coelhos early books..

hope this helps someone. 😊

It is both a blessing and a curse that everyone is so very different. What works for one person does not necessarily work for another...

I have read many books that have helped me come to grips with this unique thing that is me. Interestingly, some books I read, but apparently I was not "ready" for them and they left me cold, but years later the messages I needed were there, and I was in a state of mind to appreciate and understand them.

The Happiness Trap by Dr. Russ Harris was a good book for me. It talks about how so much of society says we have to be happy, and when we are not, we feel like a failure. It's written from an "acceptance" viewpoint, and much in the book mirrors my own life philosophies that I've been able to develop over the years.

If You Meet The Buddha On The Road, K-i-l-l Him, by Sheldon B. Kopp is another favourite book of mine. (sorry for the weird hyphenated title - butting heads with SANE forum's word filter again... grrrr...) To me, it champions the power of being our own therapist. Very powerful stuff.

Self help books can be life changing. Alas, many of them make all the sense in the world as we are reading them, but when we put the book down, the world and our problems rush back in, and we are often left wondering how to put all of those wise words into action in our own lives. That is the ultimate challenge. That is why I read and research a lot of books, and take from each of them things that I can actually use to improve my life or change it for the better. Knowledge is power...

Without a doubt, the one book that has had the greatest positive influence on me is written by a philosopher called Jiddu Krishnamurti. The book is called Facing A World In Crisis. All of Krishnamurti's writings are based on talks he gave. There is incredible wisdom in all of his writings. He taught me to be my own guru...

The Power Of Now, by Eckhardt Tolle is another amazing book that changed my life for the better. It introduced me to Mindfulness at a time in my life when I needed it most.

Thanks for starting this thread @Sahara - many hugs and happy vibes beaming your way... 🙂

Hi @Appleblossom, @MoonGal, @Ginny, @Former-Member @Former-Member and @Former-Member,

thanks for writing. A few good suggestions there - none of which I've read.

"In Praise of Slowness" sounds like something I would enjoy. I have been undergoing a very long process in down-sizing my life and getting out of the rat race. I am not working at the moment and let me tell you, I don't miss work at all! I love taking the time to do things gently and with care.

When I see people rushing around like mad chooks and proclaiming with pride "I'm so busy", I cannot relate to them! What's so wonderful about being busy? I never did get that idea. Now, when you ask how someone is doing, they say "Busy" where as they used to say "fine" or else "good" in the old days. Oh well, I guess I have been 'busy' laying on my sun-lounge, drinking tea and reading books. Very busy indeed.

Also, the book "Reality Slap" is also on my extended reading list - it's about mindfulness, isn't it? I have listened to a few pod casts from the author's website, I think. He is an Australian guy? I think I have the right one. I have been practicing mindfulness, too.

Hi @Silenus,

That's interesting that you are I have some similar tastes in reading.

I have read "The New Earth" by Eckhardt Tolle, and I think ages ago I did read some of "The Power of Now", as one of my previous flatmates had that book. (Always a bonus to have a flatmate who owns a lot of books!) Yes, I liked what Eckhardt Tolle was getting at and what he says all fits in with mindfulness practices and Buddhist ideas, too.

Believe it or not, I read Krishnamurti at uni. My philosophy teacher was really into him and recommended I read him. I was lucky enough to have a philosophy teacher who took an interest in each student (well, in those that had a lot of questions, anyway ) and what they were interested in. So, Krishnamurti was on my personal reading list, along with Jean Paul Sartre and Nietzsche.

I have not read Sheldon B. Kopp, but I have seen that book in book shops. The title put me off a bit, I think. Too negative. It might actually be a great book, though. I kind of like the idea of being my own therapist. I have to be, these days, anyway, because I don't have a therapist at the moment. That's probably why I am writing here.