The Beer Garden

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That's what I'm hearing too @Former-Member, that you're not comfortable with this woman, but you have known her for so long that you don't know how to stop seeing her .... and I am wondering whether you have been too intimidated to be able to tell her clearly what is troubling you about your relationship with her. If it is too hard to speak about, and you feel overwhelmed and unable to articulate it in the moment, then writing it down ahead of time is a very good strategy.

If you need to change what it going on, and it definitely sounds like you do, then speaking up about it is the only way to try to get past it and be able to stay with her .... otherwise, as you already know, it will be having a negative effect on your progress.

It also sounds like you don't want to suddenly stop seeing her and start looking for someone else .... although that is an option too, but would leave you unsupported in the meantime.

Take it in baby steps @Former-Member, which you have already started doing by sounding out the situation with us here .... and we are hearing you.

Maybe list the three main things that are weighing on you as a starting point. From there your mind will probably start to sort out what you need to say about it. This is the process of translating what you are feeling into something you can articulate .... and it's a process we all go through when we are trying to work out what our gut feeling is actually telling us.

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Yep .... you nailed it there @Appleblossom .... that's what I was trying to say .... the medical profession seems to recognise that Bipolar is on a spectrum by differentiating between Bipolar-1 and Bipolar-2, so why are they not doing the same with other conditions like Borderline Personality Disorder ..... they just seems to say "aspects of" instead.

Future diagnoses may be better represented on a visual scale format, which also indicates that the person being diagnosed can move down the scale with support and treatment, but will tend to move up the scale if they leave their condition unchecked ....

Visual scales might be a better way of presenting illnesses overall.... like diabetes, metabolic syndrome, etc where, left unchecked, they also move up the scale.

Hi Guys,

Thank you all so much for your messages, and for you to hear & listen to me- it as helped ground me and put things into perspective for me. And now I need to take some steps forward 🙂

I am feeling a bit better this morning. I have been to see my IVF specialist and he as ordered some urgent blood tests. He as also started me on medication for my hormones and thyroid. Its nice when things are dealt with some urgency and you see yourself making progress- I love that feeling and being around lovely people.

I am feeling somewhat tired but ok. I will respond in more detail later tonight about my concerns about my therapist, my mind is running a bit away from me atm. The diagnosis she gave me was borderline personality disorder but I don't have meet the entire criteria just a few of the traits- I hope that makes sense. To me she as really even stretched some of the traits too.

I do have a plan for the next week and half, I have volunteer training and work, my fitness training and planning on visiting family and friends and some chill out time too. I just really wanted to say thank you all for your support, I enjoy expressing myself here and I am learning a lot from you all too.

I will be back online after my gym session tonight. I am hoping it will be a good one!!!

Hi @Faith-and-Hope, I found your reply very interesting. It does help me to feel more confident to understand myself and relations to others better, it also helps circumvent some symptoms simply by recognising that they are symptoms.
One challenge I have is still for others to understand just how much I do understand, I think I can see things from other's perspectives, but my perspectives are somewhat complex and perhaps difficult to express and interperet.
You know how some people, just seem to clash, and some people just seem to get each other, I think I understand why this happens, at least with me, it leads to much misunderstanding.

Yes empathy is all that I can offer. I actually know nothing about eating disorders myself. I think most of the general public understand little about any disorders.
And even psychiatry, from my perspective, sees things from somewhat of a rigid point of view.
I agree that there are many areas of mental health that need to be better understood.

It's interesting what you say, because I feel perhaps I exist somewhat outside the mould too, so to speak, and that for a lot of reasons, I have good insight.
One thing I would like to do is to help others to understand people like me better. I think if my new councellor can understand me, and I am hopeful, then he might be able to help me.

For about ten years being diagnosed with depression, I always thought that noone could help if noone could understand, maybe the key was for me to teach myself to understand. Whatever it is called, it's the same hell I've lived with and come to know.

One constant challange I have is communication with my mother, it can become distressing for the both of us, from my perspective she is not understanding, and from hers, probably I am difficult.
It leaves me feeling misunderstood and alone. And probably leaves her feeling frustrated and helpless.

The more I learn, read, write, think, the more sense I can make of things, and if I'm right about the best psychiatric classification for me, I think it is very misunderstood, and I can see a lot of reasons why, including reasons why it's commonly mis-diagnosed and has a stigma of being treatment resistant.

...wow that was a very 'confident' thing for me to say, now I'll stop before I feel I've said too much.

I wish you more than the best in your struggle for understanding, recognition, and recovery. And thank you for sharing your thoughts.

(I wonder if I should mention how much of a coincidence the conversation that was going on here while I was gone was..)

Hope it goes/went ok re psych @Former-Member yeah, art wasnt my thing, English maybe, yeah am ok, just had a sleep in as, well didnt have to be up for anything

Glorious day here too @Former-Member ..... 😀

lol @Former-Member yeah, am ok today, thankyou