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A new start (kind of)

A new start (kind of)

Hi @Shaz51 @Zoe7 @outlander @TAB @Sam3 @utopia @Faith-and-Hope @Appleblossom @oceangirl @Sans911 @Snowie @Former-Member @soul @BryanaCamp @Former-Member @Bunniekins and whoever else is there in forumland

I have tagged some of you because we are speaking lots and some others haven't been around for long. If it's too much for you then that's okay I respect that. I won't take it personally.

I have decied to start up a new thread after my psychiatrist appointment today. Off to a new start.

Simply put, he made the point that I am pressuring myself to do stuff far more quickly than what I thought I could. When this approach fails, it feeds back into the loop that was there before (the "i am not good enough", "I have limited time", "I have wasted my life" etc).

He said it was good I didn't go to hospital and avoided ending up there. This doesn't help. What does help is changing the approach etc.

It was a good appointment. I see him again in the morning and then maybe someone else next week.

So it's not entirely hopeless or lost now.

He thought that pressuring myself to go and get this visa would be the wrong decision, given my state of panic yesterday and also this morning.

He said that I need to hold off on pressuring myself. By saying "okay now that I am in Australia for a bit longer, I need to go and find a job quickly" because this is simply unhelpful. It's the wrong attitude and will only feed back into those loops.

So am I feeling more settled? Yes. Do I know what is next? No. Does this bother me? No.

I see my psychologist tomorrow afternoon. I will get something from my psychiatrist in the morning about all of this I think, which he said he can send off as part of the extension on the visa (which lasts for 2 years anyway). It's just a case of extending the timeframe for when I can receive it.

This would effect my chances of working in defence, mi6 etc but these are already off the table for me given my history anyway. The same is the case for the military and police. It does seem like some things are cancelled out because of my MH, but maybe they are things I was never keen on anyways.

That's a side issue for now.

Going to the UK - still a goal. It's a case of how I get there and WHAT I do when I get there. We have established that rocking up with no job or place to live is too chaotic. Especially based on my experience and degree background and skills. But the UK is a goal. My Psychiatrist said "Poland is always there" so I think it might be worthwhile sending them an email asking if I could be either placed on next year's list OR alternatively get some of my money back given the circumstances. Again, not my concern for now.

My concern at the moment is explaining all this to dad. My Psych spoke to my mum today too so she is in the loop. I think he will understand, he wants what is best for me. It takes some adjustment and time. But this is life and how we live it.

THanks forumites. See you a bit later today

Edit: I heard today that one of my old tutees that i helped in 2017 is working and is at uni. Doing well and studying. I joked that we should meet up for coffee and then i can get a job at the same place lol. So today has had a silver lining. This was the student who nearly quit school. But I can only take as much credit for what they achieved. Most of it was them

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In response to: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

depends what you want @MDT just go with it maybe or read dating tips or something. Whatever doesnt feel wrong

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

@outlander @oceangirl @Shaz51 @Zoe7 @TAB @Bunniekins @BlueBay @Meowmy @Everan @Teej @Appleblossom @eudemonism @frog @eth @Gazza75 @Everan @Former-Member @Angels333 @Doglover @Sophia1 @saturnzoon @Faith-and-Hope @CheerBear @Former-Member @Molliex @Smc
@Ant7 @Adge @Former-Member @Owlunar @Queenie @utopia

Hi forumites

Just been taking it easy today.

Havent decided if I will g out tonight for a celebratory drink I was invited to for someone.

I am honestly just liking to quiet life and I feel guilty because of it.

I don't like being called old or similar because of it. Idk.

Anyway. I hope you are okay

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

@MDT enjoy your day. Take care.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

'new you' is part of 'old you' @MDT take it easy

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Hey @MDT. Guilty feelings suck but quiet life sounds pretty good to me! I know there's a bit to be said for connecting socially and for spending time with others, but there's also a lot to be said for chilling out and quiet time too I think. Balance maybe (which I suck at 😉).

I hope however you decide to spend your night it feels right and good for you.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Thanks @CheerBear

It's weird. I can't seem to find contentment with it.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Is there anything that does give you that feeling of contentment @MDT?

If quiet life is something new to you perhaps it might take some time to adjust to.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Yeah. @CheerBear

Maybe it's just I need to adjust hey.

I am finding that work is really taking it out of me. Maybe because it's not what I want to be doing so it drains me.

It may be easier when I am doing something I want to do...

I just really want the Christmas break to refill and recharge and examine what and where to next.

Idk @CheerBear what makes me content. I just don't want problems

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

It makes sense if work is taking it out of you that you might need some quiet in your life @MDT. Perhaps you 'need' quiet but don't necessarily 'want' quiet and that's tricky to feel content with, I don't know.

Hearing you with wanting a recharge break!

Gotta fly. 🤞 you find something OK feeling tonight 🙂

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Thanks @CheerBear 🙂

Take care
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