FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Our stories

A new start (kind of)

A new start (kind of)

Hi @Shaz51 @Zoe7 @outlander @TAB @Sam3 @utopia @Faith-and-Hope @Appleblossom @oceangirl @Sans911 @Snowie @Former-Member @soul @BryanaCamp @Former-Member @Bunniekins and whoever else is there in forumland

I have tagged some of you because we are speaking lots and some others haven't been around for long. If it's too much for you then that's okay I respect that. I won't take it personally.

I have decied to start up a new thread after my psychiatrist appointment today. Off to a new start.

Simply put, he made the point that I am pressuring myself to do stuff far more quickly than what I thought I could. When this approach fails, it feeds back into the loop that was there before (the "i am not good enough", "I have limited time", "I have wasted my life" etc).

He said it was good I didn't go to hospital and avoided ending up there. This doesn't help. What does help is changing the approach etc.

It was a good appointment. I see him again in the morning and then maybe someone else next week.

So it's not entirely hopeless or lost now.

He thought that pressuring myself to go and get this visa would be the wrong decision, given my state of panic yesterday and also this morning.

He said that I need to hold off on pressuring myself. By saying "okay now that I am in Australia for a bit longer, I need to go and find a job quickly" because this is simply unhelpful. It's the wrong attitude and will only feed back into those loops.

So am I feeling more settled? Yes. Do I know what is next? No. Does this bother me? No.

I see my psychologist tomorrow afternoon. I will get something from my psychiatrist in the morning about all of this I think, which he said he can send off as part of the extension on the visa (which lasts for 2 years anyway). It's just a case of extending the timeframe for when I can receive it.

This would effect my chances of working in defence, mi6 etc but these are already off the table for me given my history anyway. The same is the case for the military and police. It does seem like some things are cancelled out because of my MH, but maybe they are things I was never keen on anyways.

That's a side issue for now.

Going to the UK - still a goal. It's a case of how I get there and WHAT I do when I get there. We have established that rocking up with no job or place to live is too chaotic. Especially based on my experience and degree background and skills. But the UK is a goal. My Psychiatrist said "Poland is always there" so I think it might be worthwhile sending them an email asking if I could be either placed on next year's list OR alternatively get some of my money back given the circumstances. Again, not my concern for now.

My concern at the moment is explaining all this to dad. My Psych spoke to my mum today too so she is in the loop. I think he will understand, he wants what is best for me. It takes some adjustment and time. But this is life and how we live it.

THanks forumites. See you a bit later today

Edit: I heard today that one of my old tutees that i helped in 2017 is working and is at uni. Doing well and studying. I joked that we should meet up for coffee and then i can get a job at the same place lol. So today has had a silver lining. This was the student who nearly quit school. But I can only take as much credit for what they achieved. Most of it was them

7645 replies

4,831 - 4,840 of 7,645

In response to: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

@outlander @oceangirl @Shaz51 @Zoe7 @TAB @Bunniekins @BlueBay @Meowmy @Everan @Teej @Appleblossom @eudemonism @frog @eth @Gazza75 @Everan @Former-Member @Angels333 @Doglover @Sophia1 @saturnzoon @Faith-and-Hope @CheerBear @Former-Member @Molliex @Smc
@Ant7 @Adge @Former-Member @Owlunar @Queenie @utopia

I am feeling settled today. Work back tomorrow
Hoping for now surprises but will check my work email tonight to make sure.
Atm I want to think about anything other than work.
I have had a good day yesterday which was nice. Especially talking to a friend about relationships and dating. It's weird and hard these days I think.
I am feeling a bit depressed this afternoon so I am hoping some distraction can work it's magic.
Other than that I am well though I think.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

@MDT Hey so good, you got yourself in a stable and reasonable position in life. Hope you will soon find a nice girl in your life. I am going away in four days for ten days. I am sure you will do well . Take care.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Hi back atcha @MDT Nothing like a little diversion!

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Sooo good @MDT xx

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Thanks @eth @Meowmy @Shaz51
It worked a bit yeah. Going to get an early night tonight I think get maximum sleep for a bigger day tomorrow. No bigger than normal but I do find it can get exhausting.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

an early night sounds like a good idea @MDT
do you work tomorrow?

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Yeah @outlander Monday to Wednesday. 8:30-4:30

I get tired afterwards. But it's a good first step into a government role.

Every aspect of life has improved a bit which is good. Except for dating and relationships. But I think that just happens in its own time. That's what my friend was saying.

Just been having an easy day today.
How are you after the surgery?

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

oh that is good @MDT at least you know your set days and times. those are one of the good things about a job or a specific role in that its organised and you can work around that ie social events Thursday onwards etc.
as frustratingly slow it might be dating and connecting with someone special will happen, I hope for you it wont be to far away. you've got lots of other things falling into place in your life now though which is really great to see.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

@MDT it is good that you know you have set days this week xx

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Thanks mate @outlander
You are a good soul 🙂 I hope you are okay after surgery
Hey @Shaz51 indeed 🙂
4,831 - 4,840 of 7,645