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A new start (kind of)

A new start (kind of)

Hi @Shaz51 @Zoe7 @outlander @TAB @Sam3 @utopia @Faith-and-Hope @Appleblossom @oceangirl @Sans911 @Snowie @Former-Member @soul @BryanaCamp @Former-Member @Bunniekins and whoever else is there in forumland

I have tagged some of you because we are speaking lots and some others haven't been around for long. If it's too much for you then that's okay I respect that. I won't take it personally.

I have decied to start up a new thread after my psychiatrist appointment today. Off to a new start.

Simply put, he made the point that I am pressuring myself to do stuff far more quickly than what I thought I could. When this approach fails, it feeds back into the loop that was there before (the "i am not good enough", "I have limited time", "I have wasted my life" etc).

He said it was good I didn't go to hospital and avoided ending up there. This doesn't help. What does help is changing the approach etc.

It was a good appointment. I see him again in the morning and then maybe someone else next week.

So it's not entirely hopeless or lost now.

He thought that pressuring myself to go and get this visa would be the wrong decision, given my state of panic yesterday and also this morning.

He said that I need to hold off on pressuring myself. By saying "okay now that I am in Australia for a bit longer, I need to go and find a job quickly" because this is simply unhelpful. It's the wrong attitude and will only feed back into those loops.

So am I feeling more settled? Yes. Do I know what is next? No. Does this bother me? No.

I see my psychologist tomorrow afternoon. I will get something from my psychiatrist in the morning about all of this I think, which he said he can send off as part of the extension on the visa (which lasts for 2 years anyway). It's just a case of extending the timeframe for when I can receive it.

This would effect my chances of working in defence, mi6 etc but these are already off the table for me given my history anyway. The same is the case for the military and police. It does seem like some things are cancelled out because of my MH, but maybe they are things I was never keen on anyways.

That's a side issue for now.

Going to the UK - still a goal. It's a case of how I get there and WHAT I do when I get there. We have established that rocking up with no job or place to live is too chaotic. Especially based on my experience and degree background and skills. But the UK is a goal. My Psychiatrist said "Poland is always there" so I think it might be worthwhile sending them an email asking if I could be either placed on next year's list OR alternatively get some of my money back given the circumstances. Again, not my concern for now.

My concern at the moment is explaining all this to dad. My Psych spoke to my mum today too so she is in the loop. I think he will understand, he wants what is best for me. It takes some adjustment and time. But this is life and how we live it.

THanks forumites. See you a bit later today

Edit: I heard today that one of my old tutees that i helped in 2017 is working and is at uni. Doing well and studying. I joked that we should meet up for coffee and then i can get a job at the same place lol. So today has had a silver lining. This was the student who nearly quit school. But I can only take as much credit for what they achieved. Most of it was them

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In response to: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Good morning @MDT! How are you feeling this morning? It can be tough when we're feeling alone, it often becomes a spiral where we chase our own tail about why we're feeling lonely or if anyone is around to talk to, then if they aren't it can feel like they're not around because they don't care. It's a challenge to work our way out of those thoughts when we first start feeling them, or to explore why we're feeling that way. We've found that making a snap decision to do something else, like if we're watching tv we get up and go for a walk, or try write something, or make something. Just changing what we're doing when those feelings creep in can sometimes be enough to take our mind off it. What do you usually do when you're feeling lonely, do you have something that helps? Sending love (and hope) for your morning

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Thanks @Ali11
We are out for brekky. I'm really feeling crap this morning too.
Maybe it was the early start idk.
I'm over feeling like this though.

@Zoe7 too

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Well home now. Thank god.

I am feeling crap. Genuine with myself and with my situation.

I want to do better and I am deserving of better.

I have already planned tomorrow out which made me feel better for about 5 minutes. But I'm just really anxious and depressed this morning.

Genuinely feeling like a failure. So much so that I don't want to tag anyone because I hate bringing people down on here.

I resent the fact that I am where I am now and I think it's my own stupid fault.

I am hoping to sit in the sun and read the paper as I haven't finished that - I don't even know if I can though but perhaps it is worth a try.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Hi @MDT thinking of you. Hope you get some sun and feel a bit better later.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Thanks @frog

I have retreated to the backyard in the sun away from the noisy TV

Might just sit here for a bit away from it all.

Hope your morning is going well

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Well that was short lived.
Neighbours are arguing no stop....

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Not your fault @hamsolo1 no ones fault its life not quite how you intended.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Yeah @TAB
God I'm over it.
It's like anything I want to do that is tiny gets trampled over.
Now I'm just playing xbox. Not what I wanted to do but then that's how it is.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

You are definitely not bringing anyone down @MDT - your feelings are real and you have reached out for support with your words here. I hear how much your current situation is getting to you - it does at times feel like everything we are doing is not making a difference - but it is for you ...just slowly. You have come so far in the last couple of years. I know things are feeling harder for you today but these are the days to simply get through - do what you need to find small moments in the day that you feel okay about and let the rest wash over you when you can.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Hey @Zoe7

I spent a bit of time chilling out playing video games which has helped a bit. Will do more of that and hopefully feel a bit better after.

I feel a bit more settled atm.

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