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A new start (kind of)

A new start (kind of)

Hi @Shaz51 @Zoe7 @outlander @TAB @Sam3 @utopia @Faith-and-Hope @Appleblossom @oceangirl @Sans911 @Snowie @Former-Member @soul @BryanaCamp @Former-Member @Bunniekins and whoever else is there in forumland

I have tagged some of you because we are speaking lots and some others haven't been around for long. If it's too much for you then that's okay I respect that. I won't take it personally.

I have decied to start up a new thread after my psychiatrist appointment today. Off to a new start.

Simply put, he made the point that I am pressuring myself to do stuff far more quickly than what I thought I could. When this approach fails, it feeds back into the loop that was there before (the "i am not good enough", "I have limited time", "I have wasted my life" etc).

He said it was good I didn't go to hospital and avoided ending up there. This doesn't help. What does help is changing the approach etc.

It was a good appointment. I see him again in the morning and then maybe someone else next week.

So it's not entirely hopeless or lost now.

He thought that pressuring myself to go and get this visa would be the wrong decision, given my state of panic yesterday and also this morning.

He said that I need to hold off on pressuring myself. By saying "okay now that I am in Australia for a bit longer, I need to go and find a job quickly" because this is simply unhelpful. It's the wrong attitude and will only feed back into those loops.

So am I feeling more settled? Yes. Do I know what is next? No. Does this bother me? No.

I see my psychologist tomorrow afternoon. I will get something from my psychiatrist in the morning about all of this I think, which he said he can send off as part of the extension on the visa (which lasts for 2 years anyway). It's just a case of extending the timeframe for when I can receive it.

This would effect my chances of working in defence, mi6 etc but these are already off the table for me given my history anyway. The same is the case for the military and police. It does seem like some things are cancelled out because of my MH, but maybe they are things I was never keen on anyways.

That's a side issue for now.

Going to the UK - still a goal. It's a case of how I get there and WHAT I do when I get there. We have established that rocking up with no job or place to live is too chaotic. Especially based on my experience and degree background and skills. But the UK is a goal. My Psychiatrist said "Poland is always there" so I think it might be worthwhile sending them an email asking if I could be either placed on next year's list OR alternatively get some of my money back given the circumstances. Again, not my concern for now.

My concern at the moment is explaining all this to dad. My Psych spoke to my mum today too so she is in the loop. I think he will understand, he wants what is best for me. It takes some adjustment and time. But this is life and how we live it.

THanks forumites. See you a bit later today

Edit: I heard today that one of my old tutees that i helped in 2017 is working and is at uni. Doing well and studying. I joked that we should meet up for coffee and then i can get a job at the same place lol. So today has had a silver lining. This was the student who nearly quit school. But I can only take as much credit for what they achieved. Most of it was them

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In response to: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

@MDT hey, know the feeling you are identifying. It will eventually work out for you job wise. But it is very uncomfortable feeling waiting. Keeping on believing and hoping. Talk to lots of people. You will find somewhere to start. Life has its own evolving process. Keep faith is the most important. Take care.

In response to: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Good on you @Meowmy, really great you are trying and hope the exercise helps you. Proud of you. Been a longer than usual day for me. 3 hours or. More on train. Don't miss that at all. Have a good night

In response to: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Hope it gets better for you @outlander

Sometimes just knowing others are feeling the same can be helpful 🙂

In response to: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

I think we all tend to battle feelings like that @MDT ...... it’s been ten years now that my hubby has been unwell in the way he is, and it has taken away time that we ought to have spent celebrating our successes in life and our relationship now that our kids are grown, but I have never felt more alone in my marriage than now.

I know our circumstances are entirely different, but mi brings “walking through the desert” times with it ..... but the path is towards healing and recovery ..... and while it seems endless, especially on the worst days .... if you look back with an eye to what you have achieved, you will be able to identify things you have done for the better. Your travel experiences have been pretty awesome, huh ? And you have graduated studies .... that’s a major achievement right there !!

Try not to get down on yourself. Changes of direction often happen when we least expect them, and when we are feeling exhausted.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

@Gazza75 Hey, longer than usual working days really throws me. Last anxiety I had was in part due to that. Hopefully now I am on new meds a little more protected from that. Take care. Hope everything go smoothly for you.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

@Faith-and-Hope hey, so well said. It is walking through deserts in life with MI. Just hope we find some resting oasis on the way. Lonely in marriage must be tough. I am single though. I have a lot of lonely days. Try not to think about it myself. Anyhow, wish you a good evening. Take care.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

@Meowmy thanks, I will be fine. My brother ticked me off today which hasn't helped. I can't and won't blame him for all my woes, but, by jingoes he has been the source of a few. Fingers. Crossed on the meds. Its nearly a week right, so looking OK

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Yeah you are right @Faith-and-Hope

I am just really depressed about it all lately. Even the good things I have done aren't enough it seems 😞

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

I will be back a bit later

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

@Gazza75 Hey Gazza, my mentor told me that I need to have two hobbies. I started that. May be if you allow time for your hobbies. We could be okay whoever brush us a bit rough. Take care.

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