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A new start (kind of)

A new start (kind of)

Hi @Shaz51 @Zoe7 @outlander @TAB @Sam3 @utopia @Faith-and-Hope @Appleblossom @oceangirl @Sans911 @Snowie @Former-Member @soul @BryanaCamp @Former-Member @Bunniekins and whoever else is there in forumland

I have tagged some of you because we are speaking lots and some others haven't been around for long. If it's too much for you then that's okay I respect that. I won't take it personally.

I have decied to start up a new thread after my psychiatrist appointment today. Off to a new start.

Simply put, he made the point that I am pressuring myself to do stuff far more quickly than what I thought I could. When this approach fails, it feeds back into the loop that was there before (the "i am not good enough", "I have limited time", "I have wasted my life" etc).

He said it was good I didn't go to hospital and avoided ending up there. This doesn't help. What does help is changing the approach etc.

It was a good appointment. I see him again in the morning and then maybe someone else next week.

So it's not entirely hopeless or lost now.

He thought that pressuring myself to go and get this visa would be the wrong decision, given my state of panic yesterday and also this morning.

He said that I need to hold off on pressuring myself. By saying "okay now that I am in Australia for a bit longer, I need to go and find a job quickly" because this is simply unhelpful. It's the wrong attitude and will only feed back into those loops.

So am I feeling more settled? Yes. Do I know what is next? No. Does this bother me? No.

I see my psychologist tomorrow afternoon. I will get something from my psychiatrist in the morning about all of this I think, which he said he can send off as part of the extension on the visa (which lasts for 2 years anyway). It's just a case of extending the timeframe for when I can receive it.

This would effect my chances of working in defence, mi6 etc but these are already off the table for me given my history anyway. The same is the case for the military and police. It does seem like some things are cancelled out because of my MH, but maybe they are things I was never keen on anyways.

That's a side issue for now.

Going to the UK - still a goal. It's a case of how I get there and WHAT I do when I get there. We have established that rocking up with no job or place to live is too chaotic. Especially based on my experience and degree background and skills. But the UK is a goal. My Psychiatrist said "Poland is always there" so I think it might be worthwhile sending them an email asking if I could be either placed on next year's list OR alternatively get some of my money back given the circumstances. Again, not my concern for now.

My concern at the moment is explaining all this to dad. My Psych spoke to my mum today too so she is in the loop. I think he will understand, he wants what is best for me. It takes some adjustment and time. But this is life and how we live it.

THanks forumites. See you a bit later today

Edit: I heard today that one of my old tutees that i helped in 2017 is working and is at uni. Doing well and studying. I joked that we should meet up for coffee and then i can get a job at the same place lol. So today has had a silver lining. This was the student who nearly quit school. But I can only take as much credit for what they achieved. Most of it was them

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In response to: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

i dont have the experience or the grit or thick skin or whatever to do job I got pushed into @MDT if they advertised it as that I would not have applied, as it would have been a bit of a stretch

just need to get ahead on a few bills, spend less and try and rebuild savings then not forced to work in jobs not suited to or when body/mind not up to it

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

I agree @TAB sometimes adverts don't reflect the actual job

Yeah @Zoe7 Just trying to forget the crap my colleague wrote up. I felt like replying but not yet. Will wait longer. Don't want to say something that could make it worse.

For now just going to work on an application and get that sent off. Then I can focus on the overall plan of searching etc.

I have some music on so that might help too

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

anyhow see how it goes but if I'm lying awake at night thinking about work, best to change situation re me @MDT enjoy your music I'm going to have to get a cab to work, nowhere safe to leave car

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

I must have missed what your colleague wrote up @MDT But it seems like it was not something that gave you any confidence. It is good to remember that that is only one isolated person's views - I had that with my former principal and things changed so much when I moved to my current school. The views and opinions could not have been any more different. ...and while her views and opinions last year certainly affected me I stayed true to myself and got through it - that is where self-respect was so valuable to me. You know what you can do yourself buddy and have proven that in many different situations - the trick now is believing you the capable, intelligent and driven younf man we know you to be and I will continue to remind you of this because it is not only what I constantly see here but I have belief in you

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

All the best @TAB take it easy mate

thanks @Zoe7 yeah i was having a chat with @outlander about it last night. It's just one person's view. I guess I just have to look past that. Simply but difficult. I think the reason I find it difficult is because I seem to have this idea in the back of my mind that this colleague is the only way forward for my career. So it's taking on more of a burden than it needs to. But I think this is wrong. There are multiple ways of getting somewhere.

Anyway. Take it easy today. I'm just going to be here in the background on the forum. Checking in every now and then.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

there are always options and options on options or was that permutations @MDT just reading around the edges but yeah always others, and if that person isnt helping well so be it

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Pretty much @TAB @Zoe7

I think there is potential for that relationship to work out. I just need to explain my own position and ask where to from here etc.

Anyway I completed the draft for this bloody application. Government overdo it a lot. They ask how I have managed stakeholders while also in a high volume environment. Easy - Priorities. But they want that explained out like it's mathematics.... lol

Oh well.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Yeah can pay people to do govt job apps @MDT

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Another drafat done despite the length they want for their questions @MDT It certainly seems like exapnding on some of thioe things is excessive but it is what it is and good you have done what you can for now. Have a little distance from it for a while and then come back to see how it all sounds. Good luck with the application

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Yeah will do. I need to ring the tax office. Fun fun fun.
@Zoe7 @TAB

I googled someone I worked with and they actually ran in the election (but luckily for me they were unsuccessful) so I can use their reference now. I contacted them last week but that was on their old email.

Anyway. I think I've done a decent job today because the application is laborious.
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