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A new start (kind of)

A new start (kind of)

Hi @Shaz51 @Zoe7 @outlander @TAB @Sam3 @utopia @Faith-and-Hope @Appleblossom @oceangirl @Sans911 @Snowie @Former-Member @soul @BryanaCamp @Former-Member @Bunniekins and whoever else is there in forumland

I have tagged some of you because we are speaking lots and some others haven't been around for long. If it's too much for you then that's okay I respect that. I won't take it personally.

I have decied to start up a new thread after my psychiatrist appointment today. Off to a new start.

Simply put, he made the point that I am pressuring myself to do stuff far more quickly than what I thought I could. When this approach fails, it feeds back into the loop that was there before (the "i am not good enough", "I have limited time", "I have wasted my life" etc).

He said it was good I didn't go to hospital and avoided ending up there. This doesn't help. What does help is changing the approach etc.

It was a good appointment. I see him again in the morning and then maybe someone else next week.

So it's not entirely hopeless or lost now.

He thought that pressuring myself to go and get this visa would be the wrong decision, given my state of panic yesterday and also this morning.

He said that I need to hold off on pressuring myself. By saying "okay now that I am in Australia for a bit longer, I need to go and find a job quickly" because this is simply unhelpful. It's the wrong attitude and will only feed back into those loops.

So am I feeling more settled? Yes. Do I know what is next? No. Does this bother me? No.

I see my psychologist tomorrow afternoon. I will get something from my psychiatrist in the morning about all of this I think, which he said he can send off as part of the extension on the visa (which lasts for 2 years anyway). It's just a case of extending the timeframe for when I can receive it.

This would effect my chances of working in defence, mi6 etc but these are already off the table for me given my history anyway. The same is the case for the military and police. It does seem like some things are cancelled out because of my MH, but maybe they are things I was never keen on anyways.

That's a side issue for now.

Going to the UK - still a goal. It's a case of how I get there and WHAT I do when I get there. We have established that rocking up with no job or place to live is too chaotic. Especially based on my experience and degree background and skills. But the UK is a goal. My Psychiatrist said "Poland is always there" so I think it might be worthwhile sending them an email asking if I could be either placed on next year's list OR alternatively get some of my money back given the circumstances. Again, not my concern for now.

My concern at the moment is explaining all this to dad. My Psych spoke to my mum today too so she is in the loop. I think he will understand, he wants what is best for me. It takes some adjustment and time. But this is life and how we live it.

THanks forumites. See you a bit later today

Edit: I heard today that one of my old tutees that i helped in 2017 is working and is at uni. Doing well and studying. I joked that we should meet up for coffee and then i can get a job at the same place lol. So today has had a silver lining. This was the student who nearly quit school. But I can only take as much credit for what they achieved. Most of it was them

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In response to: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Pretty much @Appleblossom
I like adopting that attitude. It's gotten me through a lot over the years

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

I'm getting angsty about work situation but I can't be bothered right now. Need to shift focus to what I gotta do tonight.
The recruiter might be getting annoyed atm me.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

@MDT Just concentrate on what you are doing tonight for now and think about the rest later. We can only do what we can do and if you are not well still that will be affecting you too. Go easy on yourself while you continue to recover buddy

@BryanaCamp Your bro ultimately needs to look after himself but I hear your worry for him. The distance certainly makes it a lot harder for you to support him but you are doing all that you can do - you need to look after yourself first Hon.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Thanks @Zoe7
I'm just kind of over it. I canned going out tomorrow night. Not in the mood. I'll be at home all day anyway.

I just think at times that I could be doing more with my life. That it's just a waste of my time.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

You are way too hard on yourself @MDT So much of what you do currently is working towards your future but it also needs patience buddy. We often want things NOW rather than actually living in the moment with what we have. Sometimes we need to be grateful for those things we do have rather than expecting the things we don't have. You put in the hard work to move forward and have made some great progress yourself recently in so many areas - take heart in the progress you have made rather than grieving for the things you don't have. You will get there @MDT but it does take time, patience and a belief in yourself - all of which you are getting better at recognising yourself and that is positive.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

It is what it is I guess @Zoe7

I must say, you do know how to encourage people 🙂

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Must be the teacher coming out in me @MDT lol

But in saying that it is easy to encourage you because you do so much to help yourself too - just takes us sometimes for someone else to point out the positives when we are in a more negative mindset - many have done that for me across the time I have been here and you are one of them - so what goes around comes around buddy.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Lol i reckon it's your inner teacher for sure @Zoe7

Well im here now. Just gotta do my thing then they have a social after. Might see how I feel with that.

This sickness is taking it out of me I reckon.

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Yeah the physical stuff does not help with our mental health either @MDT It certainly would be knocking you around buddy. I had a headache and aches and pains for several days this week - just beginning to feel a little better today but the underlying symptoms are still there. Very much hoping I am past the worst of it though - like most things - it takes time. Pleased though it is the end of term and I can rest for a couple of weeks.

Just get through this networking thing tonight, get to tomorrow and start again - that we can both do

In response to: Re: A new start (kind of)

Re: A new start (kind of)

Lol indeed @Zoe7 that we both can do

So is it all done for term 1 now?
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