StefanieCasual Contributor
Son with no insight into his mental condition
Hi, I am new to this group. I have an 18 year-old son who is mentally unwell. He has got progressively worse over the past 8 years despite trying numerous avenues to get help. He was initially diagnosed with depression, anxiety and OCD. He was prescribed antidepressants and psychotherapy. He was on those for about a year during which he improved though they made him feel drousy and disconnected. He reached a point where he refused to continue taking them. He said they were changing his personality. His OCD behaviour became progressively worse. He has also started to threaten self-harm and be violent towards us. He has become paranoid that we are trying to drug him to suppress his personality. He is very controlling and demanding. He won’t touch any door handles out of fear of contamination, so we have to do everything for him. If we don’t he gets violent. He has kicked in about 5 doors this year which we had to replace. He dropped out of year 12 because the anxiety made it too difficult to continue. He now spends his time researching conspiracy theories on the internet and watching YouTube videos. He won’t let anyone get within a metre of him, is constantly asking us to confirm if we have touched a bin, or touched him or something. Life for the family has become unbearable. Twice this year we have had to call 000 when he got extremely agitated and we were concerned for his and our safety. The second time was the day they moved house. He became convinced the smartmeter in the new house was giving him headaches, cancer and was a form of government mind control. He was admitted to hospital involuntarily and we hoped we would get help. However, the psychiatrist didn’t think his condition warranted being made to take medication against his will. It is difficult since he is 18 and can be very convincing and hide a lot of what he is thinking and doing. The doctor did not seem to reach a conclusive diagnosis. He said he may be suffering from a psychosis or he may just have a very eccentric personality. So he was discharged with a referral to Headspace. He has been to one appointment there, but he wouldn’t tell us anything about it and since he is 18 we don’t have permission to find out from them.
We are also going through several other major issues in our family. I am transgender (male to female) and in the process of transitioning. As a result, my wife (his mother) and I have separated. Our other child also came out as transgender (male to female) and is also transitioning. We sold our house and my wife and the kids moved to a new house. I am living an hour away in a flat in the inner west because it is a more accepting environment. So there have been a large number of stresses. In addition we are immigrants with no family here to help us. And as a result of our son’s OCD and my daughter and I being transgender we have become very isolated. My wife has taken all of these things on her shoulders for so long and is severely depressed herself now. I am not sure what to do or where to go for help. We only seem to get limited help. I feel that we either need someone to stay with us for an extended period and coach us on how to deal with his behaviour, or for him to be hospitalised and made to take medication. I don’t know if the first option exists and if it did would probably be too expensive. We tried the second option, but the doctors didn’t believe it necessary, it seems like they need someone to be injured before they will consider it necessary to hospitalise.
My wife works I’m disability care and people with physical disabilities get provided with some care. I feel that my son needs a similar level of care, but mental illness is less tangible so doesn’t seem to get the same priority.
Any suggestions as to how we could get more help would be appreciated.
Many Thanks,
Stefanie
