GoatV2-0Senior Contributor
Social Anxiety (Phobia)
Does anyone else here have this?
What are your triggers or what aspects of daily life tend to be the hardest for you? Mine is centered on being perceived a certain way. Being 'good enough'
In light of recent knowledge gained through therapy, I can tell I've been viewing the world through this 'filter' since being a kid. It's affected my thoughts and behaviours to the point of drug and alcohol addiction and other reckless habits from my teens to late 20's.
Having sought out help earlier from a very average psychologist in my 20's who simply gave me handouts on CBT, it kind of discouraged me from getting further help. CBT has it's place, but this stuff is so deep-seated it took me most of my life to realize what was actually going on.
Now i have kids of my own, I am very aware of how my behaviours and moods can influence them and this is the last thing I would wish upon anyone. Let alone people i love and care about.
I've been seeing a much better therapist for the last few months but in a way find gaining this knowledge about the causes of where this all has come from in childhood etc.. has kind of worsened it. As if knowledge about it has made it even more real somehow. Even though I have lived it everyday since I can remember.
I guess I'm wondering if anyone else has had this and what has worked well for you in the past.
I know there are others on here that have had to deal with real hard life traumas and that's what makes this affliction so hard to comprehend/accept. I had a great childhood. No abuse. Nothing.
And yet I've always been on the outer. To the point where in adulthood that this condition has me over-life sometimes. I have a loving and supportive wife and beautiful kids and yet this thing is insidious. It pervades every aspect of my life. Permeates almost every thought. Has me planning out / anticipating the most mundane of tasks that most would simply take for granted as just minor inconveniences.
I've been on and off anti-depressants most my adult life and have found the (limited) benefits they give me are outweighed by the negatives, but i understand they definitely have their place in other peoples treatment.
Has anyone else had experience in dealing with this? What worked for you?
