Schizophrenia

Hi Lovers!

Its so nice to be able to open up to a community.

I’d like to share my story with you all. Hopefully get the support I need.

My bf is the most incredible soul you’ll ever meet. We met 7 years ago in high school, we lost contact then found each other again after 3 years. Loved each other but was the wrong time for us. We lost contact again. We have been talking on and off for years, as years went on he opened up about discovering he has schizophrenia! It wasn’t until this year he asked for help so I did my best to support him. We fell in love all over again. He was going through a tough time living at his dads and his mums so he was living in his car! He felt comfortable around me and ended up living with me for about 2 months. Around week 5 with me, he was struggling so severely that I couldn’t even help. He was so traumatised with the voices that were caused by the individuals without a form of care. This sent him to struggle even more. He suffered where he would be screaming, holding himself trying to make sure I wouldn’t be scared. He eventually moved out. As he couldn’t live with my housemates. He went back to his dads house and hasn’t stopped going to hospital due to his schizophrenic attacks. His always in pain, he always holding on to something that is so traumatising to himself that it can linger in his mind for weeks. It’s been 2 months now that I have only seen him once. He doesn’t want to see me when his suffering, he doesn’t even realise how long it’s been since we would last speak. I’m losing myself now as I feel like I make no difference in his life.

I’m scared to let go as he almost killed him self already.

what do I do? How can I help him? He doesn’t want help from government support as he thinks he’ll lose his License as it’s his safe haven.

He doesn’t have any money as his unfit to work and doesn’t want to keep taking money off me.

He isn’t just schizophrenic, he grew up with systhesia and has developed split personality from his attacks. His also a genius, self taught pianist, most beautiful singer and music productions.

I want to be him forever but it’s coming to a point where I never get to see him.

Id love some support from the lovers out there.

Thankyou for reading.

Jaffaz 💞