BPD I have no place I belong

Any BPD people out there

does anyone experience the feeling that they don’t belong anywhere? I don’t have many friends and no partner. I feel like I have no place and no purpose and why should I keep going?

I recently lost my job and it was a big blow to me. I wanted to hurt my self. Just over a lost job yes. I have BPD and I don’t have much social interaction. My friends are mostly from my work. So my work was a ‘safe’ place for me.

So I was very depressed suicidal. Now I’m doing a little better I don’t feel that intensely depressed, so hysterically upset that I can’t stop crying.

But I still don’t feel better if that makes sense. I have a new job but it’s 2 hours away from home which is four hours travel a day. I’m tired, my anxiety is very high. I wake up every morning and I open my eyes and just dread going in to work. I spend my lunch time crying.

does anyone else feel anything similar to what I’m describing? And what did you do about it?

thanks everyone