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Topic Tuesday // Creating and maintaining social connections // Tues 20 Nov, 7pm AEDT

Unknown userMember18 Sept 2018, 8:40 am AEST

Topic Tuesday // Creating and maintaining social connections // Tues 20 Nov, 7pm AEDT

This topic has come to us as a result from the poll we put out to you, the community. For this Topic Tuesday event will have a special guest from our Peer Ambassador program @jess_27 to share insights from their own lived experience, covering the postitive effects of social connection, managing the challenges of some negatives and idea sharing on tips and strategies to approach maintaining healthy social connections in your life.

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In response to: Topic Tuesday // Creating and maintaining social connections // Tues 20 Nov, 7pm AEDT

jess_27Senior Contributor20 Nov 2018, 7:35 pm AEDT

Re: Topic Tuesday // Creating and maintaining social connections // Tues 20 Nov, 7pm AEDT

Friendships and mental illness can be really tough. For me, I want someone who is reliable. But sometimes that makes me feel like a burden. I think it is important to make our expectations and boundaries in all relationships very clea.r

In response to: Topic Tuesday // Creating and maintaining social connections // Tues 20 Nov, 7pm AEDT

jess_27Senior Contributor20 Nov 2018, 7:36 pm AEDT

Re: Topic Tuesday // Creating and maintaining social connections // Tues 20 Nov, 7pm AEDT

haha! I get that. That's what I am like normally but when I become manic I can't get enough of attention and affection! I think it is all about striking a balance.

In response to: Re: Topic Tuesday // Creating and maintaining social connections // Tues 20 Nov, 7pm AEDT

Zoe7Senior Contributor20 Nov 2018, 7:38 pm AEDT

Re: Topic Tuesday // Creating and maintaining social connections // Tues 20 Nov, 7pm AEDT

I am the same as @Bunniekins I don't have friendships outside of online but it is something I have been working on through DBT and the connections I have made there.

In response to: Topic Tuesday // Creating and maintaining social connections // Tues 20 Nov, 7pm AEDT

AdgeSenior Contributor20 Nov 2018, 7:39 pm AEDT

Re: Topic Tuesday // Creating and maintaining social connections // Tues 20 Nov, 7pm AEDT

I said to my psychologist once - that I wish I had manic phases (I don't), because then I would have more energy.

She explained the down-side to me - so I said Ok, maybe not then...

I'm very introverted, so I need a lot of recovery time after social engagements.

Having severe fatigue issues also means that I must set limits to socialising - otherwise I pay a high price afterwards.

Adge

In response to: Topic Tuesday // Creating and maintaining social connections // Tues 20 Nov, 7pm AEDT

BunniekinsSenior Contributor20 Nov 2018, 7:39 pm AEDT

Re: Topic Tuesday // Creating and maintaining social connections // Tues 20 Nov, 7pm AEDT

@jess_27 You are right jess_27 bipolar is very destructive and it is hard for me to forgive myself for what I have done when I was very sick. I am still getting to that point. My psychologist once said to me that I (meaning me) would forgive someone of the most hideous crimes but would not forgive myself for what I have done and she is right. It is still a work in progress.

In response to: Re: Topic Tuesday // Creating and maintaining social connections // Tues 20 Nov, 7pm AEDT

jess_27Senior Contributor20 Nov 2018, 7:40 pm AEDT

Re: Topic Tuesday // Creating and maintaining social connections // Tues 20 Nov, 7pm AEDT

I think the connections you make at group are so valuable! I'm still in a facebook group with some of the people from my group and it is a great source of social support.

And also just because it is online doesn't make it any less real @Zoe7. 🙂

In response to: Topic Tuesday // Creating and maintaining social connections // Tues 20 Nov, 7pm AEDT

TeejSenior Contributor20 Nov 2018, 7:40 pm AEDT

Re: Topic Tuesday // Creating and maintaining social connections // Tues 20 Nov, 7pm AEDT

Thanks for your response @Bunniekins. I have many friendships that span over more than thirty years but I drop out for years and then come back, especially over the past 7 years. I’ve dropped off the planet with all but one friend in the last 18months. I question how to have friendships again or what I want or need from them.

Ironically forum friendships seem easier to maintain (using that word to mean stay somewhat connected).

In response to: Re: Topic Tuesday // Creating and maintaining social connections // Tues 20 Nov, 7pm AEDT

jess_27Senior Contributor20 Nov 2018, 7:41 pm AEDT

Re: Topic Tuesday // Creating and maintaining social connections // Tues 20 Nov, 7pm AEDT

That is so true! But it is possible to learn to forgive yourself. One of the biggest lessons I have learned is to be self-compassionate. You would be amazed the impact it can have on your relationships when you treat yourself better.

In response to: Re: Topic Tuesday // Creating and maintaining social connections // Tues 20 Nov, 7pm AEDT

Zoe7Senior Contributor20 Nov 2018, 7:42 pm AEDT

Re: Topic Tuesday // Creating and maintaining social connections // Tues 20 Nov, 7pm AEDT

I agree that online friendships and connections are very real - and none more than those we have here on the forum @jess_27

In response to: Re: Topic Tuesday // Creating and maintaining social connections // Tues 20 Nov, 7pm AEDT

jess_27Senior Contributor20 Nov 2018, 7:44 pm AEDT

Re: Topic Tuesday // Creating and maintaining social connections // Tues 20 Nov, 7pm AEDT

@Teej I have many friendships that I also float in and out of. I don't think this is something unique to those of us who experience mental illness but also just part of life. Try not to beat yourself up. 🙂

Yes, it seems online friendships where the demands are less strenuous and expectations are more clear are easier. Is there away we can make our regular friendships more like our online friendships?

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