Self harming and suicidal thoughts

Sorry to hear that SH visited again. @skyehaven

Maybe the stress of the shows undermined your earlier good reserve.

It is good to know that you can make yourself safe in the short term.

Living the life worthwhile ... is the challenge.

I am never cocky that I have put it behind me forever, in case I slip up again, but I feel life is worth living, so that helps, and growing older & wiser can be calming.

Take Care Apple

Things have been so difficult for you this weekend @skyehaven. You've done so well to reach out for support and to do what you can to keep going. Just to let you know, I've sent you an email to check in. As a reminder, if at any time you need immediate support please know that you can contact Lifeline 13 11 14 or Suicide Callback Service 1300 659 467. Take care of yourself 🌻

@outlander the psychologist appointments are going ok, it's a lot of talking therapy.

We discussed when I first self harmed and how it was when someone who had been really supportive abandoned me after we had a falling out, and how even though he became quite nasty about our falling out, and I don't know w by at I did wrong, yet I begged and groveled for forgiveness. He cut me off from Facebook and blocked me from messenger and blocked my number. It was the first time I harmed. Then my work mates abandoned me as well. She asked if it still hurt, and I just started crying and did for the rest of the session and was pretty emotional for some time afterwards

Lots of work to do, self harmed again tonight, 4 days straight.

@outlander I had to go to the ED again a couple of weeks ago, for wound care.

I am still self harming more days than not.

My psychiatrist was considering putting me back in hospital, but is still trying to keep me out. He is pretty concerned about my intent at times. I still see him and my psychologist every week. He is getting 2 colleagues to see me in a couple of weeks, for another opinion and has increased my medication.

I have self harmed again tonight after not doing it last last. I will have to get an independent assessment at some stage, my lawyer is organizing this, to see if I qualify as a seriously injured worker.

@outlander I have had 5 hospital admissions this year already for over 100 days in, it never helped me though.