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Friends, families and carers

about carer's fatigue

about carer's fatigue

hi everyone , I saw this written somewhere today and I tried looking it up but could not find it ,

What is carer`s Fatigue ?? I know what it is but what can you do ??

23 replies

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In response to: about carer's fatigue

Re: about carer's fatigue

Hello @Shaz51, Might be referring to compassion fatigue. Although it might apply to burnt out family members I think the term is more used for professional carers.

Cheerio. Hope your having a good day.

In response to: Re: about carer's fatigue

Re: about carer's fatigue

hello @Carer101 thank you for your message , today we saw a another new health worker today -- wants my hubby to learn to be more assertive .

In response to: Re: about carer's fatigue

Re: about carer's fatigue

Heya @Shaz51

A great question! I wrote a post about something that I think might be relevant, 'compassionate fatigue'. @Former-Member mentioned it when you start to feel run down, and burnt out to the point where it's hard to still have compassion.

@Lucky2015 and @Kiera80 have recently just commented here about making time for self-care - an important thing to do to avoid compassion fatigue!

Is compassion fatigue something you can relate to as carers @Shaz51 @Former-Member @Lucky2015 and @Kiera80?

CherryBomb

In response to: Re: about carer's fatigue

Re: about carer's fatigue

Hi @CherryBomb

Yep, absolutely I can relate to compassion fatigue.

When I was at my lowest I think I hated my sibling for putting me through the hell that was living with someone with BPD.

From my experience when you get battered about day after day after day, you just get numb and you do to a point stop caring. I even stopped caring about myself so there wasn't much love to go around anymore.

I put myself first now and try to make sure that I don't let myself get too tired or take on too much. My sibling can still be a pain in the you know what but I can say that I care a bit more now than I used to.

In response to: Re: about carer's fatigue

Re: about carer's fatigue

Thanks @CherryBomb, @Kiera80, @Former-Member, @Lucky2015,

yes i can relate to it , I have seen it worse in my cousin years ago , and i think that helps me to take a step back and to include some self help for me , it was a great article @CherryBomb

In response to: Re: about carer's fatigue

Re: about carer's fatigue

Hello @Carer101,

Dear carers , do you get Carer`s Fatique ??

In response to: about carer's fatigue

Re: about carer's fatigue

@Shaz51 absolutely- after 20 years of caring for Ms M with drug resistant anxiety , depression and now bipolar II in last 2 years or so ... I found myself this year trying to convince myself I didn’t care anymore what Ms M was feeling or going through ...I had days maybe weeks where I cut off my care factor and became a zombie doing only what had to be done and with no joy or compassion ... I felt relieved when she would fall asleep early so I could be alone and found myself thrilled at the idea of her being hospitalised for a med change so I could have a break ... the fatigue was the worst when I really felt that I was not helping and that her symptoms were not improving at all for a period of a year and a half things steadily got worse and worse until she had no expressions on her face anymore , no conversation at all to offer , no personality at all — I believe the drugs made her a zombie like being with no quality of life ... I found myself telling her doctor that I wish I could well you know make it go away for her .... that’s when the hospitalisation became a priority as the doctor could see we had really persevered with this med combination into ridiculous land ... so now I have hope for change as I saw Ms M smile for the first time in a year 2 weeks ago - I felt like my Ms M was coming back - then my fatigue started to lift as there was something worth fighting for ... I am slowly learning self care and see a therapist to help with techniques and boundaries for myself ... after 20 years I still feel like a beginner !!!

In response to: about carer's fatigue

Re: about carer's fatigue

Oh Ms M is home for a week and a half now on a new med combo started in hospital - sleep cycle is better and mood improving but still anxious and depressed as well as dodgy tummy with frequent vomit episodes and headaches ... guessing it’s side effects

In response to: about carer's fatigue

Re: about carer's fatigue

Don't know if it is different for blokes @Mandy1 but Mr D cannot self soothe when anxious. His current anxiety could be due to a number of factors but a pain med given for major orthopaedic surgery is a prime suspect, but not the only factor. The thought that we may be on the cusp of another crisis has my heart trembling.

In response to: about carer's fatigue

Re: about carer's fatigue

@Former-Member thinking of you and sending you calm strong thoughts ... in terms of alleviating anxiety I know Ms M will mostly go to bed and sleep more than she needs to ... also over the counter pain meds - not to excess but I suspect the headaches are all associated with the anxiety ... she did put a list of activities to help her control anxiety and depression on the fridge that she got from her day program - it has more productive ways to deal with her symptoms and she’s is trying to use these ... things like - pat the cat, go for a walk, Phone a friend, and many others I’ve forgotten now ...
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