Hello @Former-Member,
and @Determined, @Shaz51 and @mentalnut...
I’m sure you know... it would take more than a diagnosis to scare me away from Bipolar Bear... I can’t say there haven’t been days where I have wondered "I have watched a LOT of CSI, Dexter and Bones... maybe I could get away with it..." but those days are few and far between.
I think the choice we make, to stay put and love them even when they don’t want us too is probably one of the hardest and most misunderstood. Yes, my life would be easier without the bipolar, yes, I would like to not cry as often, yes, I would like to go to work without the worry my partner may be an emotional disaster by lunchtime... and if that is what I wanted... I could have it... but I couldn’t have him. I couldn’t have the late nights hysterically laughing about nothing, I couldn’t have his witty banter and dark humour, I couldn’t have the support he so willingly offers me when he is able, I couldn’t have my best friend... And that... is just not worth it.
I don’t judge others who cannot make this choice, and sometimes it is in their best interest not too, I would never encourage someone to stay if they felt unsafe or were in danger... or were risking their own mental health to care for another. Sometimes that is the right decision.
But for those of us who stay, who persevere through the ups and downs, the pain and hurt, the loss and grief... it makes us stronger... it makes us compassionate... it makes us, who we are... And that is special.
xx
Tigz
