When patients have serious and life threatening illness, reduced physical or neurological function often follows an acute episode or a 'close call'. With serious mental illnesses, these close calls are called suicide attempts.
Coming to terms with an attempt and the ability to find meaning and to be able to move forward in life are often addressed on literature but most of these do not mention ongoing medical and subsequent psychological issues as a consequence of an attempt.
Continuing cognitive and orthopaedic complications have been and are, a constant reminder of a very low period that Mr D remembers very little about. Cultivating self compassion has involved planting a lot of different seeds, hoping that one will germinate so that in place of self judgement and self loathing, kindness and gentleness toward self will bloom.
Coming to terms with loss is rarely a smooth process, as a carer I see there are things that can help, but these cannot be forced or hurried, they can only be suggested at appropriate times. One pdoc told me that I might need to make life changing decisions for both of us, something I am finding I am loathe to do. I see Mr D struggling with many things, yet tenaciously and bravely tackling them and I do hold onto hope that these traits will see him through the difficult phases and that he too will be able to see that he can see he again can live well in spite of his diagnosis and what occurred at a time of acute unwellness.
