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Topic Tuesday // Helping a loved one who doesn't want help // Tues 26 June, 7pm AEDT

Unknown userMember

Topic Tuesday // Helping a loved one who doesn't want help // Tues 26 June, 7pm AEDT

We asked members what they would like to talk about for the next Topic Tuesday and here it is! Helping a loved one that doesn't want help. We will be talking about how to become better informed, managing frustrations and self care, support by listening and setting boundaries.

Want to receive an email reminder on the night? Hit the 'Like' button below.

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I'm new here - what is Topic Tuesday?

Topic Tuesday runs from 7pm - 9pm AEST monthly. Each month we focus on a different topic, with the session facilitated by a Community Manager or Moderator. Sometimes Topic Tuesday will feature a special guest, who is an expert in the topic.

The first post of the thread (this one) will give you an idea of what the topic is and what will be covered.

How do I get involved?

Topic Tuesday takes place right here! It's text based, so no software is needed. During the session, to keep up with the latest posts hit the 'refresh' button on your browser for the latest posts (it doesn't automatically update). Keep an eye for page numbers at the top & bottom of the page, and jump to the highest page number for the most recent post.

Throughout the session, the facilitator will put questions out for you to answer, usually asking for your own experience on the topic. To contribute to the session, just hit the 'reply' button and share your thoughts. No answers are right or wrong and everyone is welcome to get involved.

If you have any questions about how to use the Forums, check out our Guides.

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In response to: Topic Tuesday // Helping a loved one who doesn't want help // Tues 26 June, 7pm AEDT

KellyCasual Contributor

Re: Topic Tuesday // Helping a loved one who doesn't want help // Tues 26 June, 7pm AEDT

Well said Corny! My son has schizophrenia, you could be talking about him.

In response to: Topic Tuesday // Helping a loved one who doesn't want help // Tues 26 June, 7pm AEDT

sbmcContributor

Re: Topic Tuesday // Helping a loved one who doesn't want help // Tues 26 June, 7pm AEDT

I agree, so important to recognise that lack of insight can be a protective thing for people if they don’t have the skills to cope with a belief that feels painful for them.

In response to: Topic Tuesday // Helping a loved one who doesn't want help // Tues 26 June, 7pm AEDT

YabithaContributor

Re: Topic Tuesday // Helping a loved one who doesn't want help // Tues 26 June, 7pm AEDT

sorry I disagree with you Sane

if you are going to do secret research and start talking about your loved ones "behaviour" behind their back, its only going to lose all trust and all chance of you working together with them

do research together

dont leave them in the dark about what to expect from their health condition

help them and you get as much information as you can and talk about it together

dont assume they will automatically allow you to make decisions for them

always ask first

In response to: Topic Tuesday // Helping a loved one who doesn't want help // Tues 26 June, 7pm AEDT

Unknown userMember

Re: Topic Tuesday // Helping a loved one who doesn't want help // Tues 26 June, 7pm AEDT

This is really interesting and insightful @sbmc - wonderful that having that wealth of information has helped the way in which you approach your mum. When we can resestablish our relationships we can hopefully open up that path where our loved one can realise there own needs for help and support

In response to: Re: Topic Tuesday // Helping a loved one who doesn't want help // Tues 26 June, 7pm AEDT

CornySenior Contributor

Re: Topic Tuesday // Helping a loved one who doesn't want help // Tues 26 June, 7pm AEDT

Just before my Dad died I started reading about this Dr in the USA who was a twin. His brother had schizophrenia, but he didn't.

He decided to begin researching the 'lack of insight' that is so common in this brain disorder.......I haven't returned to it and continued reading about him, been a little distracted, but yeah, he wanted to uncover exactly why. They're not being annoying, for many people it is just another part of the condition exactly like hallucinations are or anxiety or depression...

In response to: Re: Topic Tuesday // Helping a loved one who doesn't want help // Tues 26 June, 7pm AEDT

Unknown userMember

Re: Topic Tuesday // Helping a loved one who doesn't want help // Tues 26 June, 7pm AEDT

Hi @Yabitha,

I think this is a very valid point. Researching your loved ones struggles doesn't at all need to be done in secret. How you research is definitely up to you and whatever your current situation is. Sometimes it can be helpful to know a bit more about mental health to then talk to your loved one, or you can definitely research together, or even discuss needing to do some research. Transparency is a great thing. And just to clarify this is all a discussion amoungst peers and I am offering some thoughts and ideas - these do not necessarily mean they are the right way or the only way

In response to: Re: Topic Tuesday // Helping a loved one who doesn't want help // Tues 26 June, 7pm AEDT

sbmcContributor

Re: Topic Tuesday // Helping a loved one who doesn't want help // Tues 26 June, 7pm AEDT

@Corny Good point. I also like to remind myself that we will all lack insight at points or in some respects. These cognitive skills lie on a spectrum, so when I can recognise my own moment of lacking insight, it helps me to relate and respond in a way that is less likely to push my mum away

In response to: Re: Topic Tuesday // Helping a loved one who doesn't want help // Tues 26 June, 7pm AEDT

Unknown userMember

Re: Topic Tuesday // Helping a loved one who doesn't want help // Tues 26 June, 7pm AEDT

@Corny - I don't think I had a chance to welcome you tonight. Thanks for sharing this and I am sorry for your loss. I hope some of the findings from the research helped you a little bit. Its okay to take your time on that too, read as you feel you want to and are ready

In response to: Re: Topic Tuesday // Helping a loved one who doesn't want help // Tues 26 June, 7pm AEDT

HayleyCContributor

Re: Topic Tuesday // Helping a loved one who doesn't want help // Tues 26 June, 7pm AEDT

I think doing research on the mental illness isn't necessarily something you're doing in secret - but can be seen as you want to help, are concerned, and are trying to take steps to care for them? But I can see how it might be perceived by someone with a mental illness - could lead to potential mistrust and perhaps even some paranoia...

In response to: Topic Tuesday // Helping a loved one who doesn't want help // Tues 26 June, 7pm AEDT

Unknown userMember

Re: Topic Tuesday // Helping a loved one who doesn't want help // Tues 26 June, 7pm AEDT

Thanks for the reminder @Former-Member and hi everyone. Sorry I'm so late, just got dinner out of the way. Sigh.

Trying to catch up with the conversation now, hoping for minimal interruptions.

Sherry

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