Isabella_dCasual Contributor
Not isolating .. just .... safe...
Hi everyone,
I am new to this site, however diagnosed with BPD in 2014 and it felt ... right. Unfortunately. Lol.
I have fought and fought for BPD not to rule my life and I am mainly succeeding. I think.
But. A week ago I got a shock when my psycchologist said that something that had occurred in a new job was 'a shadow of the bpd' appearing when i was anxious about co-workers. I am actually annoyed. lol. I work so hard not to be bpd or have issues. My psychologist and I had just agreed that the BPD was no longer a major factor in my life. grrrrr...
But not being too hard on myself.
I hate labels.
So. I am the safest, most secure and stable I have EVER been, however, I dont have anyone in my life. I have a friend that I speak to 2-3 times a week by text/msgn sometimes phone. I dont have any family (they all passed away) and, due to life circumstances I am single, no children and no long standing friends. The last few years have been shocking with a loss of a huge amount of people in my life.
I get told not to isolate ... but when I try to make friends, it doesnt work - even though I watch myself carefully, dont put expecttions on people and am clear I am ok on my own. So. Isolation comes reallllly easily when you have no one in your life consistently .. I am safe but is it a bad thing?
Example - I havent spoken to anyone that is remotely a friend for over a week - its only been work. THis weekend I didnt speak to anyone - no texts, messages, emails calls nothing. No one to call. No one to call me.
I am definately not suicidal but ...really ... am I a bad person that deserves to be so bloody alone?
Here is the joke of my life - I have attachment issues apparently and a fear of being alone. apparently. Yet I am not attached to anyone and am completely and utterly alone.
Let me be clear - I am not lonely. But seriously, this is a farce. I have no one. And I get tired of people saying to me to get a hobby, reach out to people, say yes, go out etc etc etc ... people are too busy nowadays to have someone new in their life. My only option is to have a relationship - which I am really not chasing at all... coz .. you know ... I have made bad choices in the past and there are 'issues' that I have now due to the ex partners.
Lol.
Why is life so hard.
Sorry for the rant.