lost and confused

hi everyone...

i have just joined the forums hoping that some people can relate and help me undertand whats going on with me... Last week i was told i have DID (dissocative identity dissorder). We found this out due to some major mistakes i have made over the last four years. when it was explained to me what DID is about alot of things that i have experienced in the past made sense but i still feel lost and confused.

I have lied and decevied all of my family and friends over the years but could never understand my actions. i have lost most my friends and family due to these actions. i dont expect anyone to forgive me but i know i need to try and help myself. i have done so much good in my life but everyone has seemed to foget that and is focusing on my wrong doing. Part of me wants to tell everyone what i have been told about having this condition but i dont want them to see it as me making excusses for my actions.

Im hoping others that have DID can reach out and give advie on how they deal with situations where they feel alone. i have four kids who i love and adore very much. they are the reason i have not ended my life as these past 6 weeks have been horrible, but i feel like i need more answers to what im getting.

thank you for reading this 🙂

Mel