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@Wanderer I’m glad you’re on the forum however things are for you, and I’m sure I’m not alone in that! I like ‘seeing’ you around. I like the sound of your very big and very little dogs 😊

Hi @Wanderer .....

Do t worry about the giving and taking bit .... just b ing here is important, and part of what you may be giving without realising it, is courage to someone else in your sort of circumstances to join the forum and reach for support here too. A lot of the support comes from walking along this treacherous road together, and for that to happen, we have to be here .... posting, checking in, on the better days asking about others is a good thing to do .... throw it all into the mix and ditch the guilt feelings .... there is enough going on without carrying that too .....

💐💕

hi @Wanderer

iv been reading through some of your thread. sorry that you have been in so much pain.

i hope things get better for you. thinking of you

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Sorry to hear your day has been so hard @Wanderer I hope you can wind down and get some rest tonight. Take care my friend.

Hi @Wanderer It is great you've met other forumites.

I am glad you dont need sleeping tablets. They are dastardly things.

Farm dogs are a different breed to city dogs.

I have good farm memories from my teen years. The experiences helped me sort out the wheat from the chaff. Seriously they helped ground me and helped me survive.

Would you be able to manage on a smaller farm or a couple of acres?

Transitions can be difficult, but keep in mind your daughter needs you long term and try and picture a practical way through the minefield that often comes with separations.

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Oh @Wanderer that level of anxiety is just awful.

I'm glad you are at your sister's place.

I went through a period of prolonged high anxiety after my husband left. Before that I would not have believed it was possible for it to go on so long. It makes me feel sick just thinking about it.

I have a good GP who made time for me, and checked in frequently. There were a few experiments with medication. In the day time it wasn't helpful - just felt equally anxious and sedated but it did help at night so I could get some rest.

Doing very basic, practical things also helped a little bit. I managed to walk around the block with someone, very slowly iron an item of clothing. It was almost impossible to eat, so I made milk drinks just to keep me going.

With you friend. Really hope you get a bit of relief today

Morning @Wanderer

I am hearing you too.

I began experiencing anxiety attacks around three years ago when my husband was at his most emotionally aggressive. In hindsight I can see that I had some similar (but different) experiences earlier in my marriage when my controlling mother in law was out of hand, and I was under extreme pressure with sick kids and a work-absent husband.

At the time I couldn’t recognise the symptoms as belonging with anxiety attacks because I had not known people who could be so oppressive.

The form of emotional chaos we have at the moment is passive-aggressive. I know from what you have written before that you know all about that too.

I am so glad your sister is there for you, that you are receiving medical support, and that you ar here talking with us .... people who have experienced something similar and who understand what you are going through.

I agree with @frog .... take whatever minimal steps you can to get through each day.

It’s a bit like an earthquake .... there are big shocks, then series of smaller aftershocks, but they do diminish with time and care.

Your one job at the moment is taking care of you.

Hugs