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Not coping being a new mother

Bluegirl84Casual Contributor15 Apr 2018, 4:28 pm AEST

Not coping being a new mother

I feel very lonely, because all my family are overseas
I only have my husband and I realised how difficult and depressing is to raise a baby by myself
Apart from that i suffer from anxiety and always worrying about stupid things....I always blame my husband for retaining me here but it’s me that doesn’t want to leave him - he is an excellent husband and father. I also think it’s not good for my baby to be away from her father.
When I went to the psychologist the last time she told me I had to cope with everything by myself the best way I can but I don’t think that helped my thoughts
I feel depressed and lonely I don’t have many friends where I am now...and all of them are very busy with things as normal people but not me I feel like I’m stuck at home with baby and I think that it’s going to last forever.
We used to live in Sydney for many years but we had to move due to my husband’s job.
Any advice is highly appreciated

8 replies

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In response to: Not coping being a new mother

HappynessSenior Contributor15 Apr 2018, 6:44 pm AEST

Re: Not coping being a new mother

Hello @Bluegirl84

I don't often look at the 'Saneforums' website, but i thought i'd say hi

Just remember one important thing

No one loves their children like their mum

Again

No one loves their children like their mum

My old partners love for her children was so beautiful to me and i lost them

It's a bad world out there

But there has to be some way for you to make it work

Mums are mums

Even in this bad world

Mums are just mums

In response to: Not coping being a new mother

SnowieSenior Contributor15 Apr 2018, 9:18 pm AEST

Re: Not coping being a new mother

Hi @Bluegirl84,

Welcome to the SANE forums. I have two children so understand how hard it is at times. There is an excellent help service for men, women and families during pregnancy or early parenthood.

The web site is https://www.panda.org.au/

They also have a helpine that you can Call to get some advice. Their number is 1300 726 306

@PANDA

I hope this helps. Please keep reaching out for support

In response to: Not coping being a new mother

Bluegirl84Casual Contributor16 Apr 2018, 7:14 pm AEST

Re: Not coping being a new mother

Thanks a lot for the link! 🙂

In response to: Not coping being a new mother

Unknown userMember16 Apr 2018, 7:23 pm AEST

Re: Not coping being a new mother

Hi @Bluegirl84

Welcome to the forums 🙂 it is tough being a mum and raising a baby without much support. I had my first bubba fairly young and while i was married at the time my ex was not very supportive or 'hands on' with bubs. I dont have contact with my family and we had only just moved to the town a few months before bubs was born (a very small 3 street town). I met some people through mothers group which was my saving grace at the time and gave me a weekly outing where i could see other mums and bubs. Later on i did go to a kindergym somtimes which also helped but things got very difficult with my ex (different sort of difficulty). I was wondering if there are some activities or groups around you that you could join, baby swimming classes are good, kindergym, at local libraries here they have 'rhyme time' for singing and playing with babies in open groups, mothers groups etc that may help you feel less alone. As well as joining in here 🙂

Take care

In response to: Not coping being a new mother

Bluegirl84Casual Contributor16 Apr 2018, 7:23 pm AEST

Re: Not coping being a new mother

Happyness thanks a lot for your kind words 🙂

In response to: Re: Not coping being a new mother

HappynessSenior Contributor16 Apr 2018, 8:13 pm AEST

Re: Not coping being a new mother

some people around me have given me a bad rep

but don't believe it

i guess as usual i'll hang in there with 'the messiah'

some people around me have violent and homicidal thoughts towards me

but i just try to focus on myself and my healthy living lifestyle

don't believe my bad rep

I guess as usual i'll hang in there with 'the messiah'

thanks @Bluegirl84

don't worry, i'm alright

In response to: Re: Not coping being a new mother

HappynessSenior Contributor17 Apr 2018, 9:33 am AEST

Re: Not coping being a new mother

it's hard for me to hold a normal conversation

In response to: Not coping being a new mother

DixiegirlCasual Contributor22 Apr 2018, 1:54 am AEST

Re: Not coping being a new mother

Hi @Bluegirl84

Just want to let you know that being a Mumma is one of the hardest, most rewarding, exhausting experiences you will ever endure!

Just remember that on the tough days, even when your little one is making it hard for you, that to them, you are the most wonderful, beautiful person in their little world! And they love you with their whole heart!

I have a 1yo and although I havnt felt as though I'm not coping, there have certainly been very tough days. He was a very unsettled bub until about 5months old.

A few little tips from one mum to another-
Try to get out of the house every day, even if it's just in your own backyard for some fresh air!
Go for a walk at least a few times a week.
Go to places where you will likely meet other mums and kids.
Join a mums group if you can...
If all of your family are overseas, can.you organise a regular Skype chat so you can still see them?

Your not alone! Every mum has rough days x

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