Fragile

Thank you for noticing and caring. @AuntGlow

I can only do what I can do. I can’t make people respect or include me, or my son. I have to respect his boundaries and decisions.

Yes, I keep my musical life unfolding.

The really bizarre synchronicity is that 2 people in the quintet today, will be playing at a performance with a group where the mother of my grandson often is involved. I was asked to attend but feeling the wisest thing at the moment is to stay away. I don’t want to cause a scene or overstep. So the social creative environment actually does respect me but the family of my grandson are playing status bureaucratic destructive games. It’s small world stuff. I just have to cope with the rejection and keep finding the glimmers.

After we finished playing today the fellow who runs it, thanked me and said I was in the right place. He knew I was vulnerable and isolated from a few years ago. He also has very high standards. Maybe my merit and perseverance will prevail, somehow? Idk. Weary smile. I am self regulating.

Most of the players are unaware of the connections.

My son’s father is of the same class as the maternal grandfather. They are very upper middle class. Richer people play mental health issues differently than what went down in my family of origin. I gave plenty of informed empathy. Serious mental health issues are on all sides. Not my diagnoses, just the realities. My son was surprised his father is even interested in contacting the grandson.

I laboured for 16 years caring for a Protective services case. Hmmm. So I have seen the stories from many angles. it gave me my neck condition from my mid 20s. Overwork, not a dole bludger.

The father rammed so much politics down my son’s throat, that my son went the opposite way. I was on the same side as the father but still he rejected me.

The father excels at red herrings and changing the subject. It’s more passive aggressive and shifty. Endlessly praising Martin Luther King and American Democrats and not talking to the young man who is kin. My son’s father prioritised his first born daughter of another woman, ( protective services case, not because of me, but the nurses wouldn’t let that mother home from the hospital at birth, and I was assessed as suitable.) Anyway the father overcompensated and let her bully, and owes his youngest child, his son, and my son, a few explanations, and some moral support.

https://www.sbs.com.au/ondemand/watch/2305913411882

there is more in the media about child protection and state intervention in families these days, but it happens for more than indigenous peoples. I know what it’s like being in a dormitory as a little girl, and I know about social workers and foster so called carers, and even mistakes in official files.

these issues have impacted 4 generations in my family. It makes it difficult to have “ normal “ conversations.

@AuntGlow @tyme Edited… I know the issues are too hard.

I also know Protective Services gets it wrong sometimes . So I have to live with the consequences of that in quite a few ways.

So I pray.

and yes that bureaucrat family sneers and jeers at Christians and Christmas but take advantage of our general social conscience and goodwill.

Hope you don't mind my commenting @Appleblossom .

That's rough.

I knew someone who neglected interaction with their baby to the extent of sensory deprivation and had to learn how to parent. They later tried to teach them auslan so they'd have a secret language when with others. Had a private nanny at preschool age and isolated the kid from interactions with others. Oddly it was familial. The grandmother hadn't known you speak to and interact with infants.

Dunno the answer except infinite patience and vigilance and seizing any opportunities for mediation and/or intervention. Talk about the sins of the parents being visited on innocent succeeding generations who live with the consequences.

I could weep for you and your family and those I've known.

Of course. @Appleblossom 🥰

I am so sorry you didn't get to go to the performance group... it must be really frustrating having to say no to something you're so passionate about because of what's happening within the family.

On the contrary, it must have been really nice to feel valued in that moment and in the right place, that's wonderful. ☺️

Thank you for providing more information... it all sounds so complicated for you. Sometimes humans make life so challenging, don't they? 😣

How have you been caring for yourself this week? 💛

There was a challenge delivered to my door this week. I feel it is hounding and discrimination against a person with a disability.

the so called “help” is only available for certain personalities and demographics @AuntGlow

the long post I sent describing our experience with the mother of the little boy was sent..in the morning before I was surprised by the knock on my door

complexity is an understatement

my son is playing gorgeous Bach on the piano right now

I may need to limit my time on the forum

i am too wide open

I need to cover my soul for protection

🍎

🫂 🤗 hugs @Appleblossom

Sitting by.

I trust you can get legal aid if you need it.

Solidarity .

https://youtu.be/YsvGPj0LH0M?si=RoGx6LuqhfKbd5AJ

I edited a couple posts

but thank you for reading, caring to respond and your solidarity @Dimity

today I had fun with the little 2 year old in the street

His mum used to work for Protective services and I have been able to mention it socially a couple times. She also was grateful for old lady neighbourly support and giving attention to the little one.

that is more normal than the situation you mentioned or my grandson

@Appleblossom your post arrived just as I was thinking of dropping you a line.

2yos are great. I bought 2 picturebooks for one today.

Hope the cats are bringing you joy @Appleblossom .Old Tiger is good company.

Lovely @Dimity

@this one had a toy motor bike

the mum loved that I say playing with it is doing physics lessons

they are a genuine really lovely family in our court

hop you are as alright as possible

🏍️🌴💙🍎