Help

Hi

I tried to ring the helpline number but they were busy, I don't think it's an emergency to be ringing anyone else but please could someone help tell me what is happening;

I feel very strange and light-headed like I'm drunk, shaky with a fast-beating heart but I'm not panicking about anything, when I talk I'm not sure what I'm going to say and it's quite fast, and seems more like I'm watching myself do it from inside my head rather than causing it. My eyes are also very wide. Yesterday I walked for 2 hours because I needed to keep moving. I don't feel real.

It's been like this for the last few days, but getting worse. I'm still managing to appear normal (or so I think) to others and do normal tasks, but I'm acting.

I was seeing a psychiatrist who I think said I had bipolar and had me on an antipsychotic and an antidepressant but I stopped taking them like 2 months ago because I don't think he was right and the medication made me sleepy.
I haven't gone back and he hasn't follwed up so I figure he can't think anything is too wrong because if it was I don't think a doctor would just leave it.

Prior to this last year I had a months-long period of what might have been a paranoid delusion (or might have been real) and couldn't work or do much of anything because I was so intensely terrified and suicidal. This might have been the way it started, I can't remember.

Prior to that the year before around the same time I had what you probably would call a manic episode.

I know something's not right but I'm hoping it will go away by itself, I can't take time off work. I don't think it's bipolar but I don't know what it is and I'm very paranoid of what I might say or do while I feel like this.

What does it sound like is happening? I've been Googling and I don't think it sounds like a bipolar manic episode, I'm not euphoric. I don't think I have bipolar.

Please help me